iGet Kicked Out
by ohmygoshseddiex3
Summary: What happens when Sam's mom kicks her out? How about when Carly's dad comes home and won't let Sam move in with them? What's her next option? I'll give you a hint: SEDDIE! A story of realizations, family, friendships, and more.
1. Kicked Out

**iGet Kicked Out**

**Chapter 1:**

I never really pictured for her to go this far. I never pictured myself packing so many bags, so angrily. I never thought that I could scream that loud or feel so much hatred. I never knew I could cry this much.

I took a moment to sit on my bed for the last time and I thought about what happened to me. My own mother, having one too many drinks, kicked me out of my home. After all I'd done for her. After all of these sixteen years.

I looked around my room at everything before I packed it. Most things I just stuffed into suitcases angrily, but the things that mattered the most to me I gently placed in.

I looked at myself in the mirror. My long blonde hair looked frizzy and uncared for. And I didn't care. My blue eyes were more bloodshot than I'd ever thought.

"SAM! HURRY UP!" I heard that witch of a mother scream to me.

I wanted to curse her out, right there. But she was one of the few people I knew who was stronger than me. And she could kill me if she wanted to. She was an angry woman.

I knew a day like this would come. But I thought some neighbors would hear my mom screaming and hurting me, and my mom would go to jail and I'd live happily ever after away from her. But now, my mom was kicking me out. Why? I didn't know. And I didn't really want to know.

I had just an hour to pack everything I had and bring it to Carly's house. Well, my mom didn't tell me to go to Carly's. But she told me to leave. And Carly's house was obviously where I planned to go.

I had so many bags and suitcases and I roughly pulled my door open. I saw my mom wearing revealing clothes, with her creepy, disgusting looking boyfriend who was staring at me.

"Goodbye mom," I whispered, fighting tears. No, I wasn't going to miss her. But I hated that I was giving this all up. And I hated thinking about the fact that someone as cruel as her could have given birth to me.

"Don't call me that," my mother spat. "Get out of here. And never come back!" She was screaming.

I had no idea why suddenly one day she decided to kick me out. But I figured that night, I would be lying in Carly's apartment safely next to Carly and we'd be talking about what had happened and we'd put the pieces together.

I muttered some words that I'm not going to mention here. But when the big, disgusting man got up and ran for me with his big fist aiming for my face, I ran out of there with tears flying behind me.

I ran, having no money for any bus or anything. I ran to Carly's apartment building, and thank God it wasn't too far because I was carrying a lot of stuff. I got up there and knocked on the door.

An unfamiliar man answered the door to Carly's apartment.

"Um," I said with shaky, crying breaths. "Who are you? And where's Carly?"

"I'm Carly's father." The man was tall and tan. He looked very strict and serious, like he couldn't have been related to Carly.

"Since when do you live with Carly?" I snapped.

Carly's dad took a deep breath as if he just realized something and he put his hand on his forehead. "You're Sam, aren't you?"

I forced a small grin. "That's me," I said.

I saw Carly behind her big father. He wasn't fat. He just had a lot of muscles and it was obvious.

Carly looked like she usually did. She was wearing a purple tee shirt with a pink smiley face on it, and pink skinny jeans. Her dark hair was straightened and her dark eyes looked worried as she ran over to me. "Oh my gosh, Sam, are you okay?"

I sniffled, realizing how obvious it was that I've been crying. "Never been better," I said sarcastically. "And you never told me your dad lived with you!"

"He just moved in today," Carly explained. "It's a long story. But oh my gosh, Sam!"

I explained shakily, trying not to cry, "My mom… she kicked me out. Forever. And this is going to sound weird, and mean, but…" I couldn't finish my sentence. I burst out crying, and I realized how much it was to ask someone if you could move in with him or her.

"Aw, oh my gosh, Sam!" Carly exclaimed. She seemed like she was about to come over and hug me, but Carly's father, still next to Carly, blocked the doorway with his big, tan arm.

"Sam," his deep voice said. "I wish you luck in finding a home. And I can help you with foster care and all but…"

"Foster care?" I interrupted loudly. "I am not going into foster care!" I started crying.

"But," he continued, "You are not permitted to live with us."

"Why not?" I screamed. "SPENCER!" I screamed that loudly and Spencer came running down.

"Sam, are you okay?" Spencer asked.

"No!" I shouted. "Your dad thinks he can come marching into your house and now he makes the rules!"

"Well, Sam, not everyone is okay with you eating all of their meat," Spencer said.

"It's not even that!" I yelled, tears running down my cheeks. "My mom kicked me out of my house. I have nowhere to go! I have no family! But you and Carly have always been like family to me! And I know it's way too much to ask… but I'll even do chores!"

Carly gasped. She was also crying. Not nearly as hard as me, but she cared about me so much and I knew it. "Dad…" she whispered. "She'll even do chores. She never does chores. She's desperate. Look at her!"

My eyes stung and I could barely see.

"Carly and Spencer have mentioned you a lot over the years," Carly's dad said. "And as of now, you and Carly are lucky to even be friends. But I cannot have someone like you living with us. Now, like I said, I can help you."

"Stop acting like you care!" I screamed. "I hate you! And this is probably going to be the last time you see me because there's no point in living anymore! Bye… forever."

I slammed the door and sat against the wall next to the apartment. I never cried this hard before in my life. I couldn't breathe. I was ready to die. But at the same time, I wasn't.

Suddenly, I heard a door open. It wasn't Carly's. I looked up to see Freddie. "I heard screaming," he said softly. "What you said to Mr. Shay, it's true?"

I nodded. I couldn't speak. Freddie came and sat next to me. He looked at me in the eyes. "Sam, I'm not letting you go into foster care. And unlike Carly's dad, my mom actually sort of cares about you. Yes, she hates that you hurt me. But she cares about you. And while you were screaming, I talked to her a bit, and she said that you could have dinner with us tonight. And maybe… just maybe… you can move in with us."

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	2. Dinner with the Bensons

**Chapter 2: Dinner with the Bensons**

I couldn't get over the fact that Freddie and his mom were thinking of letting me move in. After Freddie told me that, he let me into his apartment and I changed into a nice red shirt and a black skirt that I packed. I hated wearing it, but I wanted Ms. Benson to get a good impression from me.

It was dinnertime soon, and I sat at the big table with Freddie and his mom. It was so hard for me to not just stuff my face in the food and eat politely.

It was silent and awkward, so I decided to speak. "Ms. Benson," I said, "thank you so much for even considering doing this for me."

Freddie looked like he almost choked on his food and he was trying not to laugh. I knew why. I'm never this polite, and he knows it.

But he didn't know how serious this was. He got to grow up his whole life with a mom who would never want him to leave. I grew up in a home with no love.

"Please, call me Marissa," Freddie's mom, or should I say Marissa, said with a smile. I think she liked how polite I was being. She didn't know me as a polite person. She always hated me. "Sam, you hurting my Freddie is unacceptable. But I know it must've been hard for you to grow up with a mother like that."

I just nodded. I knew that the only reason she wasn't thinking of letting me move in was because I loved hurting Freddie and she knew it.

"So," she continued. "I thought maybe your mother hasn't been a good influence on you… No offense."

I quickly shook my head. "None taken," I told her. And it was true. My mom was a bad influence on me.

"So maybe if you live with us, we can help you realize what a family is really like," Marissa said with a grin.

And that's when it hit me. I was so desperate that I was about to move in with Freddie the geek and his over-protective crazy mom. I would wake up in the morning and see Freddie's face and he would live with me every single day. We would eat meals together, go to school together, he would see me cry, we would fall asleep together, and go through everything together. But somehow, my heart beat fast and living with Freddie didn't seem too bad.

"Thank you so much Marissa," I said with a smile. I realized that I was being so fake and polite. That's not me. And if I moved in with them, Marissa would realize who I really was. There was a lot on my mind and I decided I'd just figure it out later.

I glanced at Freddie and then I looked back at Marissa. "And you're _both _okay with this possibility of… me?" I asked.

"Right now it's more than a possibility," Marissa admitted, and I grinned. She continued, "And I know that Freddie's okay with it. It was his idea."

I, eating at the same time as she said that, almost spat out my food. "Really?" I asked as I drank some water to get down the food I almost just choked on.

I looked at Freddie and he looked embarrassed.

Marissa just smiled. "Yes. And Sam... you're moving in."

I almost shrieked. "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh thank you… you won't regret it. I'll get a job… and do chores…" I babbled, but then I realized that I just promised two things that I hated doing. But I didn't care.

I was standing, and Marissa was grinning in a caring way. I was sort of scared of what was in store for me, but at the same time I really didn't care.

"Welcome to the family, Sam," Freddie said with a grin. With that, he stood up and walked over to me. He actually hugged me, and it felt nice.

This time, I hugged him back without giving him a wedgie. I whispered, "Was this really your idea?"

Freddie blushed a bit and he just smiled and didn't answer me but I knew that meant yes.

After dinner, I sat on the floor of Freddie's room unpacking. I couldn't believe what was going on. I was moving in with Freddie.


	3. Moving In

**Chapter 3: Moving In**

I was in shock. Freddie had a big room and he was going to share it with me for a while. Don't ask me why, because I have no idea, but Miss Benson had this spare cot thing. Amd that was the closest thing to a bed that she could provide me with. I gladly accepted though, since I've always thought cots were comfortable. And anyway, it's better than sleeping on the streets.

I was unpacking my stuff, or should I say trying to, but my mind was too in shock. I couldn't get over the fact that I was so desperate for somewhere to live that I was going to live with Freddork.

When I was finally starting to unpack, I noticed that Freddie was just sitting on his bed and staring at me. I looked up from my suitcase and raised an eyebrow out him. "What?" I snapped.

Freddie had a sad look on his face. "Sam…" he said softly. "I'm so sorry…"

"About what?" I snapped again. I knew that he was trying to be nice and all but I had no idea what was going on.

"That your own mother would… you know, kick you out," Freddie said gently. He then got a scared look on his face. He probably was afraid that I was going to hurt him for bringing it up.

Suddenly sadness came over me and my eyes got teary. I looked down. "Yeah, well," I said quietly. Without looking up, I continued, "I knew it was going to happen someday. But it's just hard… because if my mom doesn't want me, who will?" A tear almost escaped my eye but I knuckled it back in. I wasn't looking for sympathy. I didn't deserve it.

Freddie's hand touched my shoulder gently, trying to comfort me. He probably knew that I was on the verge of crying. He then got off of his bed and sat next to me on the floor. He smiled at me, even though I was still looking down. "I do," he told me, and then corrected himself. "We do."

"You just feel bad for me," I said, sort of angrily. I don't know why I wasn't being nice to him at the moment. I was so mean to him over the years and he actually let me move in with him.

"I do feel bad for you," he admitted. His hand was still on my shoulder. "But I also care about you, Puckett."

I smiled and finally looked up at him. My eyes were still teary. "Thanks, Benson."

Freddie just grinned. He then looked at my full suitcase. "Do you need help?" he asked, probably wanting to change the subject.

"Oh," I said, looking at my suitcase. "Um, sure."

We unpacked and time actually went by pretty fast because we were talking. We weren't talking about anything special, we were just chatting and making fun of each other as if nothing was wrong. He was probably trying to get my mind off of the fact that my own mother kicked me out. And it sort of worked.

It was a Saturday night, and we had school on Monday. I was really glad that I didn't have school the day after all of this happened, because I wouldn't be able to think straight. Sunday was going to be my day to take this all in.

So on Saturday night, I was lying on my cot that was a couple of feet away from Freddie's bed. The lights were off but I was wide awake and I was pretty sure that Freddie was, too. So I asked, sort of quietly but loud enough for him to hear it, "Freddie? Why do you think Carly's dad wouldn't let me move in?"

I heard a smile in Freddie's voice. "Because he's stupid."

I grinned. "So it was really your idea to have me move in?"

"Yeah," Freddie admitted. "We fight and all, but if we didn't take you in, then no offense, but I don't know what would happen to you."

Tears were filling my eyes again. I'd never been this emotional before. It was weird to me. But I didn't feel like crying hysterically. "Yeah…" I said. "But I really can't believe you did this for me. And I can't believe your mom, who despises me, would let me into her house."

"She doesn't hate you!" Freddie exclaimed from his bed. "If she did, she wouldn't even let you near me. Trust me. She thinks you'd be a good person if you had an adult who taught you well… and she wants to like be that adult, I guess. Sam, my mom actually feels for you. She feels bad for you. She actually cares about you."

I was surprised. I hadn't really thought of it that way. "Really?" I asked softly.

"Yes," Freddie said, and I knew that he was smiling.

"Freddie," I told him, changing the subject. "I don't know if I'll be able to fall asleep tonight."

Freddie laughed. "Don't worry. Me neither."

"Do you snore?" I asked.

He laughed again. "I don't think so."

"Good," I said, relieved. "Wait, so you don't mind at _all_ that now you have to share a room with me?"

"Nah," Freddie said. "Just don't prank me while I'm asleep."

"Good idea," I said with a smirk. It was too dark for him to see me smirking, but I bet he knew I was.

"_Sam_," Freddie laughed. "Well maybe I'll return the favor."

I grinned. "Yeah, good luck with that," I chuckled. Then my voice became serious. "Freddie?"

"Yes?"

"Thanks so much, Freddie. For everything."

"Anytime."

I smiled. I felt so peaceful, so calm. I finally lived somewhere where I didn't have to worry. I finally lived with two people who weren't going to come home drunk, and who I didn't have to worry about hurting me. Freddie and I were now silent, and I was so calm and so happy, that I was able to just fall asleep.


	4. The First Real Day

**Chapter 4: First Real Day**

It was Sunday, and I'd moved in with Freddie and his mom on Saturday. I still couldn't get over that I lived with them. I know, you're probably sick of me being in shock, but I am. It's crazy.

I got up in the morning, and when I opened my eyes I saw Freddie in a blue tee shirt and plaid pajama pants looking through drawers for clothes. I smiled. More than anything, living with Freddie was going to be cool. I don't know, I just found it cool that we were going to actually live together.

I don't hate Freddie. He's a dork, yeah, but he's okay. He's actually nice, I guess, and he can be funny sometimes. And besides, if he wasn't a dork, then iCarly wouldn't exist.

iCarly. I wondered if we could continue doing iCarly, now that Carly's dad was home. I wondered why he was home, and why God had to make him come home right when I needed to move in.

Then, I glanced at Freddie and smiled. God did this because he wanted me to move in with Freddie for some reason. And I wasn't going to complain.

Freddie turned around from the drawers. "Oh, did I wake you?" he asked. "Sorry, I was trying to be quiet."

Stretching, I said, "It's fine."

Freddie just smiled and then turned back to his drawers. He had two sets of drawers in his room, and I got to use the other one for my clothes.

It was morning, and we always think different in the morning. By we, I mean everybody. Like, in the night we might be crying hysterically about something, but then when you wake up in the morning it's really not a big deal.

Why'd I bring that up, you ask? I don't know. I guess because last night I just couldn't believe that they let me move in with them. Now, in the morning, I was just so happy and excited.

So walking over to Freddie, I had a smile on my face. I loved that I was going to live here. I went to my drawer, which was right next to Freddie's. I looked up at him. "Freddie," I said, and he turned to me. "Do I really live here?"

Freddie laughed. "Yes Sam, you really live here."

"But, why?" I asked, completely serious.

"Sam, we talked about this last night," Freddie told me.

"Well I don't remember anything from last night," I explained. "I just remember being happy."

Freddie grinned. "You were happy, huh?"

I shrugged casually, but then I smiled when I looked at his face. "I'm still happy."

"Yeah?" he asked. "Well, me too."

I raised my eyebrows at him. "Really?"

"Yes, Sam," he laughed. "We talked about this!"

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever," I said, but I still had a smile.

We each got dressed in his bathroom… _our _bathroom. We then walked into the kitchen, where Freddie's mom… or as she wanted me to call her, Marissa, had a huge smile.

"Uh, what's that smell?" I asked, smelling something disgusting.

"It's my breakfast asparagus surprise!" Marissa exclaimed.

I eyed Freddie, who was next to me. Our arms were almost touching. Freddie eyed me back. We both had the same look, but Freddie seemed to not be surprised about this meal.

"Dig in!" Marissa exclaimed as she put the plates on the table. I looked at the meal she was giving us. They looked like green pancakes. I looked back at Freddie again and narrowed my eyebrows. I would be laughing and insulting her now, but I had to be nice. I needed her to think that it was a good idea to have me move in.

Freddie seemed to slightly roll his eyes at his mom as we both sat down. I played with the pancake thing with my fork.

Suddenly, I heard a phone ring. "Oh! I'll be right back!" Marissa exclaimed as she walked towards her bedroom.

I looked at Freddie. "She's… enthusiastic," I said slowly.

Freddie nodded. He whispered, "Okay. This is what we're going to do. Rip up your pancake, and then throw most of it out of the window. It'll look like we ate them."

"You've done this before?" I laughed.

Freddie chuckled and nodded.

"Why can't we just throw it out in the garbage?" I asked softly.

Freddie shook his head. "My mom looks through the trash to see if there's anything 'suspicious' there," he explained.

"Ew! What the heck?" I laughed.

Freddie smiled and shrugged. He was so used to it.

I did as he said with my pancakes, as he did the same. We laughed as we did so.

"I'm still hungry," I complained.

"Don't worry," Freddie said. "She'll be on the phone for a while. We can grab some good food and eat in my room… _our _room."

Our room. I smiled at that. And then I said, "No offense, but I'm surprised that your mom lets you eat in your room."

"None taken, and she doesn't," Freddie chuckled.

I laughed. We grabbed some sugary cereal and poured it in two bowls and decided to just eat them dry. We went into OUR room and ate for a while, while talking.

When we were done, I asked in a bored way, "Now what?"

"I don't know," Freddie shrugged. "We can watch TV or something, I guess."

He turned on the TV and we found a good channel. As we watched, I looked at Freddie. This is the longest I've gone being with him and not insulting him. And there was a reason for that. I really just didn't want to. I didn't want to see Freddie sad and hurt because of something I said. I really just wanted to see his smile and hear his laugh.

I didn't know why I suddenly felt this way. I mean… it's probably because we were bonding or something and becoming close friends. Yeah, that's probably why… right?

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	5. School

**Chapter 5: School**

**Hey guys! Thanks so much for the reviews. I'm so sorry that it's been such a long time… okay. Review! :D**

I woke up to a really annoying beeping sound. It sounded very similar to the one that I used to have when I lived with my mom. Therefore, forgetting that I was at Freddie's house, I reached out my hand; trying to find the alarm clock to press the button, "snooze". My eyes were still closed. I reached so far, unable to find the alarm clock that I fell off of the cot with a bang.

"Sam?" an alert Freddie called out. He jumped out of his bed and ran over to me, lying on the floor next to my cot. I was lying on my back face up. He hovered over me and looked at me. "You okay?"

I grinned, hesitating before answering when I noticed a cool pattern in Freddie's eyes. _I wonder why I've never noticed how cool his eyes are before… _I thought. _And why are they starting to look worried? Oh. I better answer him. _"I'm fine, Freddie," I laughed.

Freddie laughed too. He stood and took my hand to help me up. I don't know why, but that was sort of a nice feeling. Whatever. I then looked at the alarm clock, which was actually on the night table next to Freddie's bed. "Gross, Freddica, it's 6 AM. I'm going back to bed."

I started walking back to my cot but Freddie put his hand on my shoulder. "Sam, we have _school _today. Remember?"

I turned to him. "What are you saying?"

"What, you just want to miss the beginning of school?" Freddie asked as if I were crazy.

I rolled my eyes. "I'm _tired_."

Freddie chuckled. "Come on Sam. Get dressed."

"Fine," I groaned, looking through my drawers. I found an outfit and changed in Freddie's bathroom before him. I then walked out of his room while he was still changing in his bathroom. I saw Marissa. I put on a smile. "Morning, Marissa."

"Oh, good morning Sam!" Marissa said with a grin as she looked up from her newspaper. "Do you want me to make you breakfast?"

I thought of her green pancakes. So quickly, I said, "No."

"Really?" Marissa asked. "From what I heard from Freddie, I thought you were always hungry."

"Oh, well, I am," I explained, liking the fact that Freddie talks about me for some reason, "but you're being nice enough to me. The least I could do is make my own breakfast."

A smile spread across her face. "Okay, go right ahead!"

I opened the fridge, and saw ham. I took it out, and Marissa said, "Oh yes. Freddie told me to buy that. He said you love ham, and he wants you to feel at home."

I smiled. "That was nice of him." I then cooked myself some ham even though I felt too lazy and tired to do so. I just had to remind myself that I did _not _want Marissa's disgusting food.

Freddie walked out of his room, and he grinned. "You found the ham."

"Duh," I said. "Where there's ham, there's Sam."

Freddie laughed. He made himself some toast and we ate at the table silently. When we were done, Freddie said, "Let's go across the hall to Carly's apartment and walk with her to school Okay?"

I nodded, but for some reason disappointment filled my body. It was weird, considering I've always walked to school with Carly and Freddie. It was always a nice way to start out the day. But for whatever reason, I wanted to be alone with Freddie. At the same time, I wanted to talk to Carly because she was probably worried sick about me, since I still hadn't talked to her since her father didn't let me move in with them.

I also wanted to talk with her because I was confused, and she was my best friend. What was I confused about, you ask?

I was confused because I wanted to walk alone with Freddie. It's like a cycle. Also, that the thought of walking with both of them sickened me because Freddie was in love with Carly and he wouldn't pay any attention to me.

But then I looked at Freddie's smile as he asked, "You ready?" And I remembered how nice he was being to me. I realized that there was no way that he would ignore me, because he was nicer and more understanding to me than ever with my situation.

I smiled back and nodded. "Yeah." I stood up and walked next to him. We went across the hallway and Freddie was about to grab the doorknob when I said, "Wait."

"What?" Freddie asked.

"Carly's dad doesn't want me to be friends with Carly anymore…" I said. "He's not going to let me walk with her. And if he sees you with me, then he won't let her be friends with you anymore either."

Freddie smirked. "Well that's too bad for him. Carly's not going to stop being friends with us. And I'm not going to leave your side just because I don't want Carly's dad to see me with you."

I smiled, and felt blood flow to my face. Wait… was I _blushing_? Why was I blushing?! Stop it, Sam!

I hoped that Freddie didn't notice. I don't think he did. Instead of just barging in, Freddie knocked on the door. A lot of things would have to change now that Carly's dad moved in with her.

Luckily, Carly answered the door instead of her dad. She seemed to have a big smile when she saw us. "Oh my gosh, guys, I'm so happy to see you!" she exclaimed in a hushed tone.

"You too!" I whispered. "Why are we whispering?"

"Hold on," Carly said quietly. She looked back. Spencer was on the couch, and I didn't know where her dad was. "Spence, Sam's okay!"

Spencer ran up. "Hey Sam!" he whispered. "I'd love to hear about what happened… but I guess Carly will tell me later. Sorry guys, normally I'd invite you inside but my dad… is, well, strict."

"We understand," Freddie said softly. "Carly, want to walk with us?"

Carly nodded. "Bye Spencer." She then walked out of the door and shut the door softly.

We started walking and talking. I was walking in the middle of Carly and Freddie. "You really have to live like that now, Carls?"

"Yeah," Carly groaned. "But anyway… more importantly… Sam, I'm _so _sorry for not letting you move in."

"It's not your fault!" I exclaimed as we got into the elevator down to the lobby of her building.

"My dad's just so mean," Carly said. The elevator stopped and we walked out. "I miss when it was just me and Spencer."

"Me too," I admitted as we walked out of her building.

Carly nodded sadly. "But anyway, what'd you do, Sam? Tell me everything!"

"After the whole thing with your dad," I explained. "I was crying and all, and well… it's a long story."

"Long story short," Freddie cut in. "Sam lives with… me."

We were on the sidewalk, and Carly stopped. Freddie and I then stopped too. Carly looked at us. She looked confused. "Is that even like… possible?"

"Is what possible?" Freddie asked.

"You two… living together?" Carly asked.

We started walking again. I chuckled. "It's totally possible."

"Yeah," Freddie agreed. "Carly, things are different now."

_They sure are_, I thought. "Totally," I said. "Carly, Freddie let me _move in _with him. You think I'd be mean to him?"

"Well, yes," Carly admitted.

I laughed. "Well I'm not."

"Well, in that case, I'm so happy for you!" Carly exclaimed. "Both of you. I always thought you guys would make good friends."

I didn't know what to say, but apparently Freddie did. "You were right," he said, which made me smile and—oh no, not again—blush.

"Sam, I'm so sorry about what happened to you, " Carly said. "I'll be there for you as much as I can… Unfortunately I can't that much."

"Thanks Carly," I said. "But you don't have to worry about me. Where I live right now, I'm just fine."

* * *

We got to school. When the bell rang, meaning we had to go to our first classes, Freddie walked over to me. He'd already gotten his books out of his locker and he was holding them. "I'll see you later, Sam," he said gently. He and I had most classes together, but not the first one.

"Bye," I said softly. I took books out of my locker and shut it. I watched Freddie walk away, and then I started to walk towards my class. Suddenly, after not moving too far in the hallway, I heard a mean voice behind me. "Sam?"

I turned around. It was Tasha. No, not Gibby's girlfriend Tasha. The Tasha that said iCarly was lame because it wasn't on Nevel's website. She looked the same as usual: Tall, tan, dark hair, and a mean look.

"What?" I snapped.

Walking closer to me with her group following her, she said, "Oh, I just wanted to say that I heard about your little 'situation'." She did air quotes when she said "situation".

I raised my eyebrows. "My little situation?"

"Yeah. And, I mean, I can't really blame your mom. You must be a lot to handle. I mean, look at you. You eat like a pig."

"Um, excuse me?" I asked. "You… you…" And I may have said a word or two that weren't so nice.

And apparently, Tasha wasn't too happy about this. "Sam, you're just a little reject. Stop feeling bad for yourself. Everyone has his or her little 'issues'. You're just a waste. A waste of money, and a big huge waste of space. So build a bridge and get over yourself."

I was stunned. Part of me wanted to just sit and cry, another wanted to go over and attack Tasha. But before I could do anything, I heard a deep voice behind me. "Leave her alone."

I turned around to see Freddie. He walked towards me and put his arm around me. He said, "Sam has to go through so much right now. The least you could do is give her _sympathy_. Maybe you could _help _her. Be _nice _to her. Ever think of that? But no. You're actually being mean to her. That just shows how heartless you really are."

Tasha rolled her eyes, not seeming to get anything from what Freddie had said. She then walked away with her group and I looked at Freddie.

"Thank you…" I said softly.

"I'll always be here for you," Freddie said. "I promise." He put his arms around and that's when I started crying. I was crying because of everything, and nothing. But the tears were partly of joy, because standing there in Freddie's arms was one of the best feelings I'd had in a while.

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**I think this was a particularly long chapter... well... I hope you enjoyed it anyway. Review!**


	6. The Pranks Are On

**Chapter 6: The Pranks Are On**

**Author's Note: Oh gosh guys, sorry it's been so long. The truth is, I was having trouble thinking of new ideas for this chapter… and as I'm writing this author's note I have little ideas but I'm just going to pretty much think of the ideas as I write the story… Anyway, I want to thank each of you for your reviews! They all mean a lot to me. But, there's one I want to answer, the one from Good Graces. I appreciated this review, and I agree. Edge and banter is what they need, or else it's a little too OOC. And one of the cute things about Seddie in the show is their fighting and stuff. So, I'll keep this in mind as I write. :)**

**Okay, I'm probably boring you, so here's the chapter!**

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That week, I was getting pretty used to the Benson life. And it was pretty cool, I guess. I've always thought it would be cool getting to live with a friend. I never pictured living with Freddork, though. But, I always pictured living with Carly. But of course, everything had to change. And I didn't even have time to picture life with the Bensons.

But, like I said, I was getting pretty used to it. I would wake up every morning, and at first I would be wondering where I was. But that happened less and less. Then, I'd try to go back to sleep but Freddie would make me get up. We'd both get ready in the same bathroom at the same time, which was kind of… weird. I usually got changed first, and then I'd make myself breakfast and try to act extra nice in front of Marissa, which was getting harder and harder. We'd then go and meet up with Carly, and Carly would always worry and ask if I'd hurt Freddie yet and we'd always say no. Then Carly would go off about how annoying it is living with her dad and how she wants her life back. Then we'd get to school and Freddie would try and protect me from mean people, but they always gave me mean looks. I didn't tell Freddie about that, though, because he'd freak out.

And then the three of us would walk home together. I used to go to Carly's after school, but because of her dad, we just went straight home. When we got in we would have a snack while watching TV. Then Freddie would start his homework and I'd continue to eat and watch TV until he nagged me enough and I'd do a little homework but basically I'd just copy from him. We'd then eat dinner and then Freddie and I spent some time talking, or we would just do our own thing for a while. We'd then go to sleep and I'd still get the chills at the thought that Freddie was sleeping two feet away from me.

And, it was crazy, but I almost got through a whole entire week with the Bensons. It was Friday, almost Saturday again. We cancelled iCarly that evening. Not the whole web show, just that one show, because Carly was afraid to ask her dad if we could do it.

Living with Freddie and his mom was comforting, but there was something missing. I guess, I've known Freddie for so long and my relationship with him has always been that I make fun of him, hurt him, and prank him. But, I had to make myself stop. He was doing such a nice thing for me, I couldn't be mean to him!

On Friday night, I was lying in my cot in the dark, with Freddie on his bed a few feet away. I smiled at Freddie as he said: "Hey, tomorrow's your week anniversary. Of living here, I mean."

I grinned. "I know," I said. I wanted to say more, to thank him, but I couldn't. I would probably end up saying too much. I wanted to tell him how much that moment meant to me, when he asked me to have dinner with him and his mom and that I could possibly move in with him. But I had to talk. "Freddie… what you did… that was the best thing anyone's ever done for me."

Although it was dark, I could see Freddie now sitting up. "Really?"

I smiled and nodded. "Really."

"Eh, well, I don't regret it," Freddie said. I grinned. He then said, "Well, you're not being mean anymore."

I frowned. "Yeah, I'm not being myself."

"Is this a new you, or are you not being yourself on purpose?"

I hesitated, but then I decided to tell the truth. "On purpose," I sighed.

"Sam," he said. "You don't have to change."

"Yeah, I thought so too, but if you like the new me then I guess the least I could do is stay this way."

"Sam…" Freddie said. "Yeah, you're all sweet now. But did I ever say I like the new you better than the old you?"

"Freddie, I know you hated it when we fought."

"You don't _know _how I feel about anything," Freddie said, and I could tell that he was smirking. The way he said that made me wonder. But hey, I over-analyze everything. "Fighting with you was always fun, Sam. It was us. The way we were. And it was fun."

I smiled. "Thanks," I said. "For letting me be me… but my mom kicked me out. And now I live with a whole different family. I'll always be Sam Puckett, but maybe I will change… because I wouldn't have to live with my mom always… just, I might change." I didn't want to go on too much. I didn't want to tell him what everything was like at home.

"Don't worry about it too much. Just be Sam."

I grinned. "So I can prank you and stuff like old times and you won't kick me out?"

"Yes, but just keep in mind that the hospital isn't a fun place and I don't feel like going back there."

I chuckled silently. "I got it."

Freddie fell asleep, and I pretended to sleep. Soon, I heard his calm breathing, and I crept out of my cot. I took out the whipped cream and feather I was hiding under my blanket and crawled over to his bed.

You know that old sleepover prank where you put whipped cream on their hand, tickle their face with a feather, and they touch their face because it tickles so then there's whipped cream on their face? Well, I was doing it. I never did the prank before, but I always saw it on TV and it looks sort of fun. Face it; pranking Freddie was the best.

I put the whipped cream on his hand, glad that it came out sort of quietly. It wasn't that quiet, but sleeping in the same room as Freddie for almost a week made me find out that he wasn't a light sleeper. I then tickled his face with the feather, only to see him smear the whipped cream on his own face.

I chuckled very softly. I wasn't tired, so I just knelt by his head and looked at him. He was sleeping on his side. He usually slept on his side, facing my cot, just like he did tonight. He had a small smile, and he was breathing silently. I was glad that he didn't snore. He looked so calm, just lying there.

I then took a deep breath, knowing that I had to go to sleep because I knew that if he woke up and the first thing he saw was my face, he would freak out. So, I took the whipped cream and feather and went back to my cot. I took one last look at Freddie's calm face, making me smile. I then fell asleep.


	7. Easter with the Bensons Pt 1

**Chapter 7: Easter with the Bensons Pt. 1**

**Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews, guys! :D  
**

**I'm doing this Easter thing because I like to make my stories around the same time as I write them, and since yesterday was Easter, I'll make it Easter in this story! :D By the way, happy Easter, belated Passover, or whatever holiday you celebrate! (:**

**P.S. This was going to be a really long chapter, but I'm splitting it into two. :p  
**

On Saturday morning, I didn't get to sleep in like I would want to. I woke up to the sound of knocking.

My eyes opened when Freddie and my bedroom door swung open and the cheerful face of Marissa was the first thing I saw, in our bedroom doorway.

"Happy Easter!" Marissa exclaimed.

"What time is it?" I groaned. I picked up my pillow from under my head, about to throw it at her, but then I remembered that I had to be nice so I just put it over my face.

"It's already eight AM, Sam! Rise and shine!" Marissa said. She then looked at Freddie. "Fredward Benson, what is on your face?"

I looked at Freddie and I chuckled, seeing the whipped cream still on his face.

Freddie touched his face, looking at the whipped cream that he just wiped off of his face. "Hmm..." he said sarcastically, looking at me. He was smirking, like he already knew that I did the prank. "Um... shaving cream." I guess he knew that I pranked him... and he didn't want me to get in trouble. That was nice.

Marissa gasped. "Freddie, you shave your face?"

"Mom, I'm sixteen," he said, glancing at me in an embarrassed way. "I've been shaving for a year now."

I grinned. Little Fredward Benson is growing up.

"And why didn't I know about this?" Marissa asked.

"Mom," Freddie groaned. "Please."

A sad look formed on Marissa's face. "But it's Easter! Don't you want to go to that special Easter egg hunt you've always loved?"

Freddie's face turned bright red. I could tell that he was avoiding looking at me. "Um, yeah, sure… can I just… get ready?"

"Sure!" Marissa exclaimed, now looking happy. She shut the door to his room.

I tried not to let myself laugh about the Easter egg hunt thing. I really wanted to, but I knew that he was embarrassed enough.

Freddie looked at me. My hand was covering my mouth. He said, "Oh, just get it out."

I started laughing hysterically, and Freddie looked angry and maybe even a little sad. "I'm sorry," I said with one more chuckle.

Freddie smiled a little and rolled his eyes. "It's fine," he said, walking over to his drawers to get some clothes out as I did the same. He continued, "My mom's just annoying sometimes." He got some clothes out and started walking slowly to the bathroom.

I was picking out clothes, but when I heard him say that, I hesitated. I didn't know how to respond to that. Normally, I would make some joke about his mom, but my mom might just be a little more "annoying" than his.

I guess he heard me taking a deep breath. He put the clothes that he picked out down on his bed, and he said softly, "Sam, I'm sorry."

"No… don't worry about it," I said flatly. I wondered how much Freddie knew about what everything was like before I got kicked out. I wondered if he knew that the reason I got so tough was because if I wasn't tough, I would be dead right now. Thinking about it made tears fill my eyes.

"Sam…" he said tenderly, and I turned around only to be greeted by Freddie's arms. His arms were around the middle of my stomach, and he gently stroked my back. I put my arms around him, too, my arms touching the back of his shoulders.

The way he had his arms around me gave me the chills. Freddie's been so sweet to me lately… and I guess I've been pretty nice to him, too. I guess we're just getting close… but sometimes it feels like something else. But, whatever.

Then, he just smiled, gently pulling away. "You've never had a real Easter, have you?"

I grinned. There's always been this bond that Freddie and I had, where he just sort of gets me sometimes. There are a few things we have in common; like that we can always make each other laugh and all of that chiz. But also, I think that he knew that I really didn't feel like having a sad talk, so he changed the subject. I don't know, maybe I'm over thinking things. So, I just smiled and shook my head. "Nope," I said. "Well, I never did anything for it. Not even when I was a kid."

"Well," Freddie said with a small smile as he grabbed his clothes to change into. "Today, you're gonna have an experience that most people _only _have when they're kids."

I chuckled. "A big Easter egg hunt, huh?"

"Yeah," Freddie laughed. "In the park. My mom's taken me there every Easter for my whole life. You know, I think she always will, and maybe when I have kids I always will."

"A Benson family tradition, huh?" I said. "Hey, maybe if I like it, I'll take my kids there, too."

Freddie chuckled in a nice way, but I wondered why.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing, nothing."

I raised my eyebrows.

"I'll tell you someday," Freddie said with a smirk. And with that, went into the bathroom, leaving me sitting on his bed, wondering what was up with him.


	8. Easter with the Bensons Pt 2

**Chapter 7: Easter with the Bensons Part 2**

When we got to the park, we were standing by the side. I sort of felt like a loser, seeing a bunch of elementary schoolers running around and giggling.

My arms were folded as I watched all of those kids running around, and the wind was blowing my hair to the side. I looked to my right, up at Freddie. He smiled at me. And then, for some reason, I didn't feel like a loser standing here anymore.

"You really go here and hunt for eggs every year?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said, but then he leaned down to my ear and whispered: "But, I don't try to find eggs. I just go to my secret place."

I smirked and raised my eyebrows. "Your secret place?"

"Yeah, but my mom thinks I go for eggs. So, don't tell her."

"Oh yeah, 'cause all I do all day is gossip with my best friend your mom."

Freddie laughed. "Follow me," he said. He gave his mom a wave, and then he started running.

"Wait!" I said, laughing as I ran behind him.

Freddie turned around to me and started running backwards. "Come on, Puckett! You can run faster than that!"

I was laughing, and soon I caught up with him, and a little after that I even got in front of him.

"Wait," Freddie said, out of breath, after a while. "This is it."

I looked around. It was beautiful. I'd never seen grass so green, sky so blue, and the sun so bright. Also, between two trees was a bench swing. You could tell that the bench swing wasn't made by professionals.

I looked up at Freddie, and he was smiling at me. "Freddo, this is amazing."

"Yeah, you don't even realize how fast we ran," Freddie said, smiling. "We're at this part of the park that no one knows about. See? Do you see or hear any annoying kids?"

I was quiet for a second, looking around. "Yeah, you're right! But um… someone else must know about this place. There's a bench swing here. Was it here last time?"

"Yeah…" Freddie said uneasily. He sat on the bench swing and I gently sat on it next to him. He looked at me. "My dad made it once. He's the only person who I showed this spot to… besides you."

I chuckled softly. "I feel special." I tried to remember Freddie's dad, but then I realized that Freddie barely ever mentioned him. And, I don't remember meeting him. "I've never met your dad, have I?" I asked, looking at my black flip-flop next to Freddie's sneakers.

I realized that it was taking Freddie a while to answer, and I looked at him. He seemed to be fascinated by our shoes. He took a deep breath, and I looked at him as he looked down. He had a sort of sad look on his face. He then looked back at me and he smiled. "You know what? I'll tell you about him later. But let's just say… I think you've met him before. He's your Uncle Carmine. I'm your cousin, Sam."

I looked at him, my heart dropping and my eyes widening. But, Freddie was smirking as he said: "Gotcha."

"I hate you!" I exclaimed, but I was smiling. I stood up.

Freddie got a truly scared look on his face, but he was still smiling a little. He stood up too, and he sprinted away, even further from the park.

"Oh, you know I'm faster than you!" I shouted happily as I ran after than him.

"Not when I'm scared!" he exclaimed, running too.

I didn't try to run fast, because honestly, I can't see myself hurting him anymore. It's fun, it really is, but I don't know. And I guess Freddie knew that, because he did look kind of scared but not as scared as usual.

But soon, I saw Freddie trip and fall. I kept running, and I was chuckling at him lying on the grass on his stomach. I knew he was okay because he was smiling too.

"I tripped," he muttered.

I laughed, seeing a small twig under his shoes. I picked it up. "On this?" I chuckled, showing him.

"Oh, come here, Puckett," Freddie said, grabbing both of my ankles. I tried to get my feet out of his grip, only causing me to fall down, too.

I was lying on my stomach after I fell. Freddie was lying on his stomach, too. It was windy and the grass was long and soft. I made myself face him, so now we were both on our stomachs facing each other. I glared at him because he tripped me.

"Sam," Freddie said, smirking. "I know you're not gonna hurt me."

I smirked too. "What gives you that idea?"

"I don't know. Fine, hurt me. Right now. It's the perfect opportunity." He was smirking.

I sighed. "Yeah, you're right. But don't think you're off the hook now, Frederly. I'm still Sam."

"Yeah, I know. Like last night." He smiled, and I looked deeply into his eyes. So deeply, it was like I could see into him. It was a perfect opportunity to just look into his brown eyes like that, just lying on my stomach with him lying in the same position in front of me. His eyes have always seemed small to me, but they looked so big now. I tightly closed my eyes, trying to snap myself out of it.

I smiled, knowing he meant the whipped cream thing. But, I grinned and just said in a sarcastic tone: "What? I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Sam," he said, smirking. "I was awake."

I felt heat on my face when he said that. Maybe my face was turning red. But, I said, "You were not. Come on Benson, you wouldn't have let me prank you if you were awake."

"Think what you want, Puckett." He was smirking.

"Whatever," I said, looking deeply into his eyes again. But then, I snapped myself out of it again, wondering why I was suddenly so fascinated by his eyes. I figured it was nothing. He just had cool eyes, that's all. I started pulling at the grass, pulling some of it out of the ground. I put all of my attention on the grass, trying to make myself not think about how much I wanted to look back at his eyes.

"So," he said, "how are you feeling about the Benson life?"

"I'm adjusting," I said, smiling. I looked at him. "Honestly, I can't believe it's already been a week. _So_ much better than my home life." Thinking about it made me sort of sad. I looked at Freddie, and he looked like he was ready to listen. He was always a great listener. I like that, because I'm a terrible listener, so we balance out. I was sad, and so ready to talk. "I don't know, Benson… since Melanie left, it was just me and my mom… and whichever guy she brought home that day… and, she always…" Tears filled my eyes, but not enough for me to actually cry. "I don't know, it just wasn't fun."

"She always what?" he asked softly.

"She just wasn't a good mom, that's all."

"Oh," Freddie said, and he stood up, brushing grass off of his lap.

I stood up too. Freddie looked worried, I guess because he knew that I was hiding something. "But it doesn't matter now, right? I never have to go back home."

Freddie paused as his expression slowly turned into a half smile. "Never." He fixed his jacket and looked at his watch. "Hey, we better head back now."

I felt my heart sink. "Oh." was all I said.

Freddie started walking, and I followed, walking very slowly, taking in the whole place once more and lightly touching the trees and the bench swing as I walked. He stopped walking and turned around. "You coming?" he asked.

"Yeah…" I said. "But Fredward?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for letting me see your special place," I grinned. "It really means a lot."

"Don't thank me," he said. "I wanted to."

I smiled. I walked by his side, back to the main part of the park to see Marissa. She looked worried. "Where were you two this whole time?"

"Uh, right here mom, hunting for eggs."

She then smiled. "Wow, you must've been running around so much, I didn't even see you!"

I chuckled, looking down, thinking about how much Freddie was always treated like a baby.

"Did you two have fun?" Marissa asked.

Freddie looked down at me. "Yeah. A lot of fun."

"How about you, Sam?" Marissa asked.

I looked at Freddie, noticing a twinkle in his eye. I looked back at Marissa, and nodded. "Best Easter I ever had."


	9. A Sad Day for the Bensons

**Chapter 9: A Sad Day for the Bensons**

I thought it was just another day. It was to me. But not to Freddie and his mom.

It was the last day of Spring Break. I thought it was just going to be a lazy, miserable day of trying to forget that we had school the next day. I was wrong.

The first thing I saw when I woke up was Marissa. I realized that she'd been trying to wake me up for a while. Something in her eyes looked different today. She didn't have that normal cheerfulness she usually did. She also wasn't wearing any makeup, and she was just wearing a black long-sleeved shirt and a black knee-length skirt with black boots. All black.

"You're up," Marissa said softly. "Sam, I'm sorry for waking you up this early, but we need to leave soon. Please get ready now!" She left the room.

I was so tired that what she had said didn't process into my head until after she left. I then wondered where we were going. I shrugged it off. I yawned and stretched. I then turned to my right to see Freddie.

Freddie was sitting up in his bed, staring forward into space. His eyes were bloodshot and there were bags under them. I'd never seen him look so tired and blank before. Not even when we watched all of those dance videos.

"Uh…" I said, getting up slowly. "Did you get any sleep last night?"

Freddie didn't even look at me. He was still staring into space as he slowly shook his head.

I narrowed my eyebrows, confused. "Uh… where are we going today?" I asked as I sat on the edge of his bed.

Freddie slowly turned his head to me. His mouth was curved down and his eyes had never looked that sad before. "Cemetery." That one word he said made me realize so much, but not enough.

"Why?" I asked slowly, knowing it was a stupid question, but I figured that he would tell me who died.

"What do you think?" Freddie snapped, throwing the covers off of him angrily and standing up. He started walking over to the bathroom.

"Okay," I said, "sorry!" I put my hands in front of me and backed off.

Freddie sighed and turned back tot me. He put his hands lightly on my elbows. "Sam, I'm sorry. Look…" He sighed again and sat on the edge of his bed. "Remember how you were asking me about my dad?"

"Yeah," I said slowly.

"The reason you don't know much about him, and the reason I didn't want to talk about him is that five years ago, when I was eleven, he died. Exactly five years ago, actually. It's his death anniversary." Freddie's eyes looked so sad, as he got off of his bed and started going to the bathroom again.

I was shocked. I turned around, about to say something, but Freddie was already in the bathroom with the door shut. I just stared at the door, my mouth open a bit. Today, it was Freddie's turn to be the messed up one, which meant it was my turn to help him feel better.

I sighed, slowly walking over to my drawer. I knew that people wear all black at funerals, and even though this wasn't a funeral, I decided to wear all black because that was what Marissa was wearing.

The only black things I had were a regular black thick-strapped tank top and black skinny jeans. I know I seem like the type who would have a lot of black clothes, but I don't. But still, I'm not much of a pink person, either. I sat on Freddie's bed and waited for him to get out of the bathroom.

When he got out, Freddie gave me a sad smile. "Sorry for not telling you about this. My mom told you to, but… I don't know, it hurt too much."

"It's fine," I said softly. I stood up from his bed and started going to the bathroom. "So, is it just going to me, you, and your mom?"

"No," he said. "My Uncle Carl, Aunt Jennifer, and cousin Amanda are going to be there… sorry for making you come. You don't have to, you know."

"I want to," I said. He just nodded, and I walked into the bathroom and closed the door. I got changed quickly, and I brushed my teeth and hair. I decided I'd take a shower later. I washed my face and walked back into the bedroom.

Freddie then went into the bathroom again and changed into a black tee shirt with a black hoodie over it and black baggy jeans. I guess this meant that we were supposed to wear all black.

Marissa prepared a small breakfast. I ate a lot, but Freddie didn't even touch his food. His facial expression never changed from this morning. I hated seeing him this sad. I don't know him like this. I know him to always be cheerful, like Carly.

It was a silent breakfast until Marissa said softly, "Let's get in the car." I just nodded as I slipped on my black flip-flops. Freddie put on his black sneakers. We walked out the door and into Marissa's car.

Freddie usually sat in the front of the car, but today he sat in the back.

"Why are you sitting in the back?" I asked.

Freddie just shrugged, looking out his window sadly. "My dad was sitting in the passenger seat of a car when he died."

I swallowed hard, not responding to what he said with anything other than: "Oh." I'm not good at comforting people. I stared out of my window too, and there was a silent car ride to the cemetery. It only took ten minutes to get there, but it felt like an hour.

When we got there, I only heard the sounds of us closing our doors. I followed Freddie and his mom, as they were walking to a certain gravestone. When we got to Freddie's dad's gravestone, three people were already there. They were sharing hugs with Marissa and Freddie. I figured that meant that it was Uncle Carl, Aunt Jennifer, and Amanda. I took a deep breath.

They all seemed friendly, but sad. "You're Sam, right?" Jennifer asked. I guess they all knew about me.

"Yeah," I said. "I'm really sorry."

"Thank you," she said. "Leo was my brother… a great guy, really. I can't believe it's already been five years."

I just nodded. I didn't know what to say. I figured that Leo was the name of Freddie's dad. I never met Freddie's dad, so it was hard for me to say anything about him.

I also met Jennifer's husband, Carl, and their daughter, Amanda. She was about two or three years older than me. I remember Freddie calling her "icky" once. She seemed fine to me.

"Freddie," I said after I met Amanda, "what's so icky about your cousin?"

Freddie shrugged. "She always thinks she knows everything."

"Is she ever right?"

Freddie nodded. "Almost every time. It's just annoying, I guess."

I just nodded. Freddie went up to stand in front of the other five of us. It was almost like he was giving a speech, but there weren't a lot of us there, so he was basically just talking.

"My dad…" he said sadly. "Leonard Benson was such a great person. He was smart, understanding, and always here for all of us. He was the best dad I could ask for." He looked down, and I couldn't believe it. Freddie was about to cry. I mean I know everyone cries. But I never imagined seeing Freddie cry. "And one day," he continued, his voice cracking. "One day, exactly five years ago… I was eleven years old, and I was sick, just with a little stomachache. So, my mom and dad went out to buy me medicine. But on their way back… a drunk driver hit them." He looked at Marissa. "My mom survived." He looked back down. "My dad didn't."

I knew that he was going to cry, but I didn't know what to do. I just stared at him. I knew I should go over and hug him, but I just didn't. I saw Amanda walk over to me as I stared at him.

"You really like him, huh?" Amanda asked softly.

I turned to her. She had long, pin-straight dirty-blonde hair and green eyes. She was taller than me. "What?" I asked.

Amanda smirked and sighed. "You don't have to pretend. I won't tell him."

"Tell who what?" I asked.

"I won't tell _Freddie_ that you _like him_!" Amanda said as if it were obvious.

I sneered at her. "I do _not _like Freddie. What gives you that idea?"

"The way you look at him, of course!" Amanda said. "Don't worry, I won't say a word. Sometimes, people like people and it takes them a while to realize it. So, I'll let you realize it on your own." And with that, she walked away.

I raised my eyebrows at her. I shook my head. There was no way I could like a nub like Freddie. Yeah, he's really sweet, and funny, and smart, and caring, too… but there's no way that I could like him as anything more than a friend. I'm still adjusting to liking him as a friend.

Freddie went and stood next to me. The six of us were still standing around Freddie's dad's grave, and everyone was silent. I guess it was like a moment of silence, with everyone thinking about him. As if it was a movie, rain started pouring down. Wearing only a tank top, I felt goosebumps form on my arms because of the cold as water dripped down on them.

Without saying a word, Freddie took his jacket off of himself and put it over me. I slipped my arms in the sleeves and felt the warmth of Freddie's jacket cover me. I smiled, loving what he just did.

I then looked at Amanda, who was looking down, probably thinking of her uncle. I sighed. She was so wrong about me liking him. I only liked what he just did because now I'm warm. That's what friends do. They let each other borrow their jackets.

I looked at Freddie. It looked like he was crying, but I wasn't sure if that was just rain on his face. I whispered, "I'm really sorry, Benson. I wanted to try and help make this day better for you, but I couldn't. For all you've done for me, the least I could do is try. You're one of the best friends I've ever had… and I'm sorry about what happened, and that I couldn't make your day any better."

I saw something on Freddie I hadn't seen for the whole day. A smile. He wrapped his arms around the middle of my stomach, and I hugged the middle of his chest. He whispered, "You just did." I loved the rare hugs we shared. They always felt nice.

After pulling away, I gave him a small smile and he gave me the same look. He looked back down at the dirt, probably thinking of his dad. It was weird being this nice to him. But I had to.

I looked back at Amanda, and I bit my lip. There was no way she could be right… right?


	10. Revelations

**Chapter 10: Revelations**

I didn't talk to Freddie much about his dad after we left the cemetery because I figured that he wouldn't want to talk about it. But, he did tell me that the reason his mom is so overprotective is that his dad died. He said that at first she was just making sure that he did everything as safe as possible. But soon she started with the too-healthy eating and all of the other weird things she does because she wanted to make sure that Freddie was always one-hundred percent safe and healthy all the time because she knew how much it would hurt if she lost another person that she loved that much.

We went to school the next day. I couldn't think straight the whole day. I couldn't stop thinking about my life back at home. It was like the memories were coming back to haunt me.

And apparently, people could notice that I felt this way. After a slow day of school ended that day, I walked home with Freddie, and Carly got to walk with us today.

"Sam?" Carly asked quietly to me as we walked. She was walking in the middle of Freddie and me.

"Uh-huh?" I answered, not even looking at her as I was staring blankly in front of me.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

I turned to Carly, and she had a worried look on her face. I shrugged. "I'm just tired," I lied. "I mean… yesterday was a big day."

Carly turned to Freddie and gave him a sympathetic look. "I know," she said sadly. "I'm so sorry, Freddie."

"Thanks," Freddie said with a small smile. Since I started living with him, I figured out that the smile he was wearing right now was a fake smile. He only used that smile when he wasn't okay, but he wanted other people to think he was.

"No problem," Carly said, a smile growing back on her face. She looked forward, and I did the same. I could see Bushwell Plaza in the distance. "So guys," Carly said with a grin after a short silence. "How's life at home?"

I shrugged, stuffing my hands into my jacket pockets. "Fine."

Freddie nodded in agreement, looking at Carly. "Yeah, it's good."

"I'm so confused," Carly chuckled while shaking her head. "You guys living together is like… I don't know, a bacon and jelly sandwich. It just doesn't work."

We reached Bushwell Plaza. While opening the door, I turned my head to Carly and said, "Well, think of it this way. A bacon and jelly sandwich doesn't _seem _right, but they actually taste pretty good together."

Carly laughed, walking in. "You've had a bacon and jelly sandwich?"

Freddie walked into the lobby after holding the door for Carly and me. "You're surprised?" he cut in.

I just smirked and shrugged. We all went into the elevator, and I pressed the button. I remembered how Melanie and I used to always fight over who got to push the button in the elevator. I missed that.

When we got to our floor, we stopped in front of Carly's apartment. She looked at me, a worried expression on her face. "You're _sure _you're okay?"

"I'm fine," I groaned.

"You really weren't acting like yourself today!" Carly said. Her eyebrows rose.

"Really?" I said. I shrugged. "I wasn't feeling like myself either. But I'm okay. I swear, Carls."

Carly hesitated, but then she sighed and nodded. "Okay." She leaned in to give me a quick, friendly hug.

I went across the hall and opened the door to Freddie and my apartment. I turned around and saw Carly say quietly to Freddie, "Look out for her, okay?"

Freddie nodded. Softly, he said, "Of course."

* * *

That night, I was lying in my cot on my back just staring at the ceiling. The light was off, and it was nighttime. It was the time Freddie and I usually fall asleep, and I was wearing pajamas, but I wasn't tired. I couldn't stop thinking about my mom and her boyfriends, and what happened to me every day. My eyes were adjusted to the dark because they were open for so long.

I turned to my right to see Freddie's bed a few feet away. I looked at Freddie, and he was staring at me. He wasn't smiling, but he wasn't really frowning either. He seemed deep in thought.

"What?" I asked.

Freddie took a deep breath. "I'm just thinking."

I sat up a bit, being full in energy. "About?"

"Stuff."

"Like?" I asked.

"You."

I lowered my eyebrows. "What about me?"

He finally came out and said it. He sounded sort of… firm. He almost seemed angry, but he wasn't. It was just like he needed to get a point out. "Your life, Sam. You always seem like you're hiding something. I live with you. And this might be the first time since Melanie moved out that you actually live with someone who cares. I do care, so don't think you can hide things from me. If there's something you need to say about your life at home, just say it."

I looked straight in front of me. I swallowed hard. "Every day," I said softly, but loud enough for him to hear. My voice cracked a bit, as I already felt tears form in my eyes. I've never been an emotional person until I moved in with Freddie. "Every day, I would come home and just hope to God that my mom didn't have a lot to drink. I mean, she always had something to drink, like enough to get her drunk, but if she drank enough, she would… she'd hurt me." I heard Freddie move in his bed, but I didn't move my eyes an inch. I just stared at my knees, which were now sticking up in front of my face. "You always thought I was just _so _tough and strong, but Fredward, if I wasn't tough then I wouldn't be here right now. I _needed_ to be. If I lived in a home like Carly's or yours, I wouldn't even _know _how tough I could be. I would probably be like Carly. And the guys she brought home…" Memories poured into my brain. "If she was mad enough, she would let them do _whatever _they want."

I suddenly saw Freddie get out of his bed and run over to my cot. I felt his warm hand on my arm pull me out of the cot and into a hug.

"What's the worst thing that they did to you?" he whispered while holding me.

"Nothing that bad, really…" I assured him, feeling my chin touching his shoulder. Tears fell out of my eyes. "But like… they really creeped me out... they touched me and stuff... but they never got worse than that. But it was horrible, Fredward, why do you think I spent so much of my time at Carly's?"

"I'm so sorry," he said softly, pulling away, "for even bringing it up."

"No," I said quickly. I wiped the tears from my eyes. "I'm actually glad you did. I never told anyone about that before. Not even Carly. It was really good to get that out in the open."

Freddie gave me a small smile. He sat on the edge of his bed and patted the spot next to him, as if inviting me to sit there.

I sat down on his bed next to him. He looked at me. "Why didn't you ever tell anyone?"

"I didn't want to have to go into foster care," I said without hesitation because the answer was clear to me. "That's what would've happened."

Freddie sighed. He shifted his body so that now he was lying on his bed the right way, with his head on the pillow. His eyes were still open, though. "Is there anything else you need to tell me?" he asked in a caring way.

I looked at him, and I sat up next to him on his bed, my head touching his pillow. I shrugged. "Not really."

"Sam, is this why you were acting all weird today?" Freddie asked, sitting up next to me on his bed.

I just nodded. I shook my head slowly and sadly. "It was like a regular… daily thing. I didn't even think about it. Like, on the few days that I actually came home instead of going to Carly's, I always had to think of plans to avoid my mom and whatever guy was with her. It was normal."

Freddie looked into my eyes. "Sam… you can tell me anything if you ever want to. You know that, right?"

I nodded. "Now I know."

I don't remember much about what happened after that. I remember closing my eyes, and the last thought I had was: _Maybe Amanda is right_.

I dreamt about one person, and one person only: Freddie Benson.


	11. Trouble

**Chapter 11: Trouble**

**Author's Note: In response to thegoodlife1's review: How'd you know? ;D And for all of you, your reviews really put a smile on my face. And it takes a lot for me to smile by just reading something over the computer. So thanks so much, guys! Now, here's Chapter 11!

* * *

**

"Mom, nothing happened!"

That was the first thing I heard in the morning. It was Freddie's voice, yelling at his mom. I opened my eyes, and everything looked different. Yeah, I was still in Freddie's room, but I wasn't on my cot.

That's when I realized I was on Freddie's bed. I was surprised at first because I didn't remember anything. When I started to remember the night before, I realized that the last thing I remembered was lying on Freddie's bed with Freddie and talking. I fell asleep on his bed.

Still tired, I got up anyway because I heard Freddie and his mom having a fight. I was pretty sure that I knew why. She probably saw Freddie and me. So, still wearing my red short-sleeved plain shirt and red-and-white polka dot pajama pants, I walked out into the kitchen.

Right when Marissa saw me, an angry look formed on her face. "Samantha Puckett, I let you _live _with me! I give you food and I treat you like a child of my own! I give you a place to sleep! And you thank me by…" She shuddered, and she didn't finish her sentence. But I knew what she was talking about.

I shot Freddie a quick glance, and I hoped that my face wasn't red because of what Marissa assumed. I looked back at Marissa and angrily said loudly, "Thank you by _what_? Having a conversation with your son and accidentally falling asleep on his bed?"

"Right," Marissa said angrily, turning to the fridge. I couldn't believe that I was fighting with her like she was my own mother.

I looked up at Freddie, and shot him a "what-the-heck" look, with my eyebrows down and my arms spread apart a bit on either side of me. He gave me the same look, shaking his head and rolling his eyes at his mom.

Marissa turned back around and put her hand on my shoulder. "Look, Sam, I wanted to help you. Really. But Freddie is my son. And even if you didn't do anything, sleeping in the same bed and cuddling with him is still too much."

"Cuddling?" I repeated angrily. "We weren't _cuddling_!" I turned back to Freddie.

"Well…" he said slowly to me. "We… were." He then looked back at his mom. "But we were _asleep_! A lot of people grab onto things when they're asleep. We didn't realize what we were doing!"

Now I knew that my face was red. Freddie and me were cuddling in our sleep? I wasn't sure if I was grossed out, embarrassed, happy, or a combination of the three.

"Well," Marissa said, quieting down a bit now. "I'm sorry. I just can't allow the risk that you two might sleep in the same bed again."

I was becoming nervous. Was she going to kick me out just like my mom did?

No. I wasn't going to let this happen again.

"I'll move my cot!" I suggested. "I'll sleep in here, or in the living room or something!"

"You could still sneak into his room after I'm asleep," she said. "Don't act like I don't know all of the silly things you teenagers do like that."

"Marissa," I said sadly, "I wouldn't do that. This is where I live. I won't have anywhere else to go."

"Sam, I just need time to think. You two can go to your room now." She hesitated as Freddie and I started walking. "Actually, only one of you can go to your room. The other has to go somewhere else."

"We can't even be in the same room alone anymore?" I yelled. If I wasn't trying to win her over, I would go over to her right now and snap her in half. I could if I wanted to.

"You can go in our room if you want," I sighed to Freddie, trying my hardest not to scream. "I'm gonna take a walk."

"Want me to come?" he asked softly.

"No," Marissa cut in before I could answer. "Freddie, go to your room. Sam, be back soon."

I started walking into our room to get clothes for myself, and Marissa asked, "Just where do you think you're going?"

"You _want _me to go outside in my pajamas?"

* * *

Wearing a regular outfit, I left the apartment. I was about to open Carly's door and just walk in like I used to, but then I remembered. Her dad. I frowned. Even if I knocked on her door, her dad probably wouldn't let me in.

I sighed and took out my cell phone. I called Carly, and she answered after a few rings.

"Hey Sam!"

"Hey."

"Uh, are you okay?"

"I've been better, why?"

"You sound upset."

"Well, I kinda am. Are you home?"

"Yeah. You can't really come over though…"

"I know… want to take a walk, and go to Groovy Smoothies or something?"

"Yeah. Come in the hall, I'll be out in a minute."

I hung up the phone, and waited for Carly to be out. She really was out in a minute. She gave me a sad smile. "Hey."

We started walking, and there was awkward silence. I hated it. I used to go to her house every day, look through her fridge, eat all of her food and sleep there all the time. Now, I only see her in school. It's not the same. It scared me that it's possible that soon I'll be closer with Freddie than I am with Carly.

I decided to get my hopes up. We just needed to break the ice, and we'd be talking normal again. So, to start a conversation as we walked into the elevator, I said, "So what's up?"

"Not much," Carly said, sounding sort of sad. She looked at me. "I love my dad. But everything was better before he came. Spencer and me were doing fine. He took care of me well and he's the coolest brother ever. And you and Freddie got to come over all the time. And now it's like we don't even know each other anymore." I looked at her. There were tears in her eyes.

I sighed, looking back down. The elevator door opened and we were in the lobby.

Before I could respond to what Carly said, we saw Lewbert on the phone. He was screaming into it: "No. No! Mother! Just bring me my ointment? … What do you _mean _what for? You know why I need it! … But it itches!"

We walked out of Bushwell Plaza, both chuckling quietly at Lewbert. As we walked out, both of our laughters were growing louder and harder, until we were both laughing hysterically.

"I miss you too, Carls."

Carly grinned at me. We walked across the street to Groovy Smoothies. While opening the door, Carly asked, "So, why were you all upset before?"

I sighed. "I might have to move out of Freddie's."

Carly shot me a look. "What'd you do to Freddie?"

"Nothing!" I said, putting out my hands in defense. We started walking over to the counter to buy smoothies. I looked at her. "For once I did nothing! And I got in trouble!"

"Well what happened?" Carly asked, her eyebrows looking nervous.

I took a deep breath. I then realized didn't really want to tell her.

She knows Freddie and me as two people who hate each other so much. Two people who always fight and attempt to injure each other. Two people who would never, ever fall asleep in the same bed because they were having an amazing talk. And I knew there was nothing wrong with telling her, but I liked keeping it between Freddie and me. And his mom too, I guess. Freddie and me are becoming really good friends, and I want it to just happen without Carly knowing and being all surprised about it. I want it to be natural, without Carly trying to help or anything weird like that.

Maybe it's time that I don't have to tell Carly EVERYTHING. At least not for now.

I shrugged. "Nothing, never mind."

"What are you hiding?" Carly asked, in her "I'm-scared-about-what-your-answer-might-be" voice.

"Nothing," I chuckled, "never mind, it doesn't matter."

Before she could answer, I ordered my smoothie from T-Bo. After I got it, I lied: "Oh, I just remembered! Freddie's mom wanted me to come home. We're gonna talk about what's going to happen about… me moving out and all." The only reason I lied was because I wanted to change the subject so that she'd forget. Freddie and me sleeping in the same bed is not something to be told.

"Um, okay, bye," Carly said, confused.

I gave her a quick hug, and I quickly walked out with the lemon-flavored smoothie in my hand.

I went back across the street to Bushwell Plaza. After going up the elevator, I got to our floor. When I stood outside of the door to our apartment, I heard Freddie and his mom yelling at each other.

I sighed. _More fighting? _I thought.

I decided to eavesdrop. I'm Sam; it's who I am. I naturally need to eavesdrop when I know that people could be talking about me.

"Freddiebear, I'm sorry. I wasn't sure if I was making the right decision when I let Sam move in with us. But you're my son. Your safety is more important to me than anything. And so… I think Sam has to move out."

_No! _I thought. _No, this can't be happening! My life has been going great since I moved in with Freddie. If she kicks me out just like my mom did, I'll have no options left!_

But, my thoughts were interrupted by Freddie's voice saying something that shocked me.

"Well, mom, if she has to move out, I'm moving out with her."


	12. Only Option

**Chapter 12: Only Option**

**Author's Note: Okay, I have a big apology to make. I'M SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE. Stuff happened in real life, but I promised I'll try to update more often. All of your reviews were so awesome, guys! :D **

**Okay, I need to respond to Fiddlegirl's view: Thanks for the review! :) The thing is that this is the first story I have that's had one solid point of view, (like usually I switch it between Sam and Freddie often), so I want to keep the whole story just on her point of view. Like, if I did Freddie's point of view, then you can't question if he likes her or not, because he'd say in the chapter. You know what I mean? :D**

**And I know this is a long author's note, but I just wanted to say sorry for having Sam always out of character. I realized that it's hard for me to keep her in character because I usually turn characters like her into me. Like, it's easier for me to keep Freddie in character because he's more like me. I'm not aggressive, or strong, or a tomboy, or any of those things. So I always, without meaning to, slowly turn Sam into me. But trust me, I'm going to try hard to keep Sam as Sam. She might change throughout the story, but she'll always be Sam. (: Okay, I'll shut up now. Review!**

I saw the door to our apartment swing open. I quickly stood up and scratched my head awkwardly. I turned my head. It was Freddie.

"You heard that, didn't you?" he said softly, his voice sounding more deep and quiet than usual.

I sighed. "Maybe a little."

"Sam, I don't think she's really kicking you out."

"Yeah, she probably is. It's always the best for little Fredward," I said flatly while rolling my eyes.

"Just listen. If she is kicking you out, then you won't be alone." He slightly smiled. "You got me? I'm not just leaving you on your own, okay?"

I smiled. "Thanks, Freddork."

Marissa suddenly opened the door and saw us talking. She completely ignored me as she looked at Freddie. "You are not moving out again, Fredward Benson. Now get back into the house."

This reminded me a lot of the time he moved out because his mom kept embarrassing him. But that time was funny. This was serious.

Freddie folded his arms. "Why?"

"I don't want you talking to her," Marissa said, still not even giving me a glance.

"And why not?" Freddie asked, his arms still folded.

"Because she just puts you in danger. Sleeps in the same bed as you, makes fun of you, hurts you…"

"I haven't hurt him since before I moved in and you know it," I snapped at her.

"But _that's _what I mean," Marissa said. "The way you talk to me. I know that's how you are, but I've been noticing that you two have become close friends. Pretty soon, my Freddie is going to be rude."

"Mom, that's an excuse. You know that won't happen!" Freddie exclaimed.

"No, I don't know that. There's something called peer pressure, Freddie."

"We're sixteen!" I shouted. "Sixteen years old! And yeah, maybe I am 'rude', but Freddie _knows _that I wouldn't try to change him." I looked at her. She had wide, angry eyes. She didn't seem to care about anything I said. Sounding quieter but still very angry I said, "You know what? I don't want to live here anyway. I'll go on my own. See you never." I turned around and walked down the Bushwell Plaza hall. I got to the elevator and pressed the button, waiting to go down to the lobby.

"Wait," I heard the low voice of Freddie breathe. I saw him run over to me. "I told you, I'm not leaving you alone, Sam."

My heart beat fast. "Where's your mom?" I asked softly.

"She's gonna come and chase me any minute. She just went inside to get your stuff. I don't even know why." He stared at the elevator door, waiting for it to open. "My god, how long does it take to open?"

The elevator door finally opened, and I jumped in just as I heard Marissa's voice shouting for Freddie. I saw her face for half of a second as she tried to get into the elevator, but we pressed the "Close Door" button so much that it closed right before her.

While in the elevator, I tapped my foot because I was nervous. "Freddie, what are you doing? You know she's gonna find you somehow. She'll probably even be right there when we get out of the elevator. And even if we do run away, she'll call the police and you'll be on the news."

Freddie put his hands on my shoulders and looked into my eyes. "Listen to me, Sam. I know. But I don't care. I'm not just gonna let one of my closest friends go off on your own. You're gonna be safe and not alone, somewhere and somehow. Okay?"

I just grinned. I didn't really know what to say, so I just nodded. I was going to hug him or something, but the elevator door opened.

"My mom's probably coming down the stairs now, hurry," Freddie whisper-shouted. I was still in a state of shock, so my legs wouldn't move. He grabbed my wrist and ran, pulling me along with him.

"Where are we going?" I asked, now finally running for myself.

"Anywhere, we just need to hide!"

We ran and found a small, dark space between two buildings. We both stood there, out of breath.

"Freddo," I breathed, "you need to go. It's not your fault that any of this is happening."

"It's not yours either!" Freddie exclaimed.

"Listen," I said firmly. "This is my battle. And thanks, Benson. But you could get in serious trouble for running away, and your mom's gonna call the police and stuff anyway… I'm used to being in trouble. There's no harm for me being in trouble again, but you shouldn't be. I promise I'll be fine, and I know I don't say this often, but please, Benson. Go."

Freddie looked at me seriously. I didn't know if he was agreeing with me or not when he wrapped me into a hug and rested his chin on my head. "You know if anything happened to you then I don't know what I'd do with myself," he whispered.

I smiled. "I'm a strong person. Now go."

"Sam? Freddie?" I heard a female voice from behind us. At first I was scared that it was Marissa, but it didn't sound like her. I turned around. It was Carly.

"What are you doing here?" all three of us whisper-shouted at the same time.

Freddie and I looked at Carly as Carly looked at us. All together, we whispered, "I'm running away."


	13. Familiar Song

**Chapter 13: Familiar Song**

**Author's Note: AAHHHHHHH! I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, SO sorry! Whoever follows this story, or any of the other stories I write, you may have noticed that I haven't updated in like 3 months. My computer broke in June and it's still broken. I'm using someone else's computer right now. I will try to update all of my stories today or tomorrow. On the upside, in my notebook I've written more chapters for some of my stories, especially this one. Actually, I've written like seven or eight chapters for it. xP I'll try to update it super fast. Again, so many apologies guys, I really hope you understand. I also want to thank you again for your reviews. They make me smile, seriously. :D**

**P.S. If you haven't heard of it, look up the song Running Away by AM, If you're a big Seddie fan, you'll recognize it. ;D**

**P.S.S. I can't believe Sam's mom is gonna finally be shown on the show! And not only that, but I read somewhere that the plot is that Sam has a fight with her mom and moves in with Carly. -_- Ironic much?**

"Carly, why you?" I asked, surprised to see my goody-two shoes best friend here. "I mean... your dad, I know, but what about Spencer?"

"I don't know if I'm seriously running away for good... I just need to think," Carly explained."Why you guys?"

I frowned and sighed. "Freddie's mom kicked me out."

"Oh yeah," Carly said with realization, remembering what I'd told her earlier. "Why, though?"

"She just hates me," I said with an innocent shrug. I guess it was true, even though what really triggered her anger was when she found me asleep in Freddie's bed with him.

Carly sucked in her lips, a sympathetic look on her face. She put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Sam."

I shrugged, and as a result Carly's hand slid off of my shoulder. "No biggie."

"Yes biggie! Big biggie!" Carly exclaimed in a Carly-ish way that made me smile.

"Whatever, I'm bored and hungry, let's just go," I said.

"Go where?" Carly asked, spreading her arms wide apart.

"Somewhere," Freddie finally cut in, as I almost forgot that he was here. He said, "I'll buy a tent and some food. Sometime tomorrow I'll sneak back into my house and grab some money, but I have enough now."

"Sounds good," Carly grinned, holding out both of her fists. Freddie and I both knuckle-touched one of her fists. Carly's smile faded and turned into a more confused look. She looked at Freddie. "Freddie, why are you running away?"

A sheepish grin formed on Freddie's face. "I wasn't gonna let Sam run away by herself."

I saw a smile appear on Carly's face. Actually, it was kind of a cross between a smile and a mischievous smirk. She was thinking about something. I knew she was. I shrugged it off.

"Oh yeah, Freddork was just _leaving_," I said, giving him a push away to wherever.

Freddie smiled playfully. "Aw, but I already promised to buy you guys all this stuff."

"Freddie can stay," Carly chuckled.

"Whatever," I said in the most flat way that I could. But deep down, and I mean really, REALLY deep down, I was glad that Carly said that.

* * *

After we bought the stuff and trying not to look suspicious, we held the tent as we went to a park where we knew was a good place to camp, or at least look like we were camping.

While we walked, Freddie started to quietly sing in a cheerful and slightly joking way. "Did I tell you I knew your name?" he sang softly, "but I think that I've lost it."

I sharply turned my head to him. The song he sang was so familiar... it reminded me of him for some odd reason... it made my heart beat so hard and fast... but why? Come on... it was on the tip of my tongue...

"Did I tell you it's my own game? This is not your problem," Freddie continued to sing. He then turned to me and his lips grew to a smirk. I guess he knew that I was confused, and why I was confused for that matter.

"What's that song?" I asked getting annoyed. "It sounds familiar."

Freddie just shrugged slightly, still smirking. So he wanted me to figure it out on my own. Awesome.

I looked at Carly, asking her with my eyes what the song was. She just shrugged. She didn't look like she cared as much as me. So it was probably a song she never heard before. Why would there be a song that only Freddie and me heard? We barely ever hung out without Carly... and I don't think I heard this song after I moved in with Freddie...

"I don't know if I'm gonna change," Freddie sang, "wasting time in another day."

I stopped walking, a flashback coming and hitting me. That song. That one line that Freddie just sang. That was playing during my first kiss. During Freddie's first kiss. During our first kiss. During the moment when my lips touched Freddie's for seven or eight seconds. I swallowed hard.

"Sam, are you okay?" Carly asked, snapping me out of it. There was a concerned look on her face.

"Yeah," I said, "why?"

"Um, I don't know, you stopped walking, your face turned a weird color, and you stared into space like you saw the light?"

"Oh," I chuckled. "Well, I'm fine."

The three of us started walking again, me in the middle. I looked up at Freddie and smirked at him. In sync, we continued to sing the song. "I keep running away! Even from the good things." I realized that he started to sing that because we were running away. _Yes_, I just realized that. Sometimes I'm slow, okay?

I smiled. "I keep running away," the two of us continued to sing, "even from the good things."

We got to the park. I saw a lot of campers there, so we'd fit in. Freddie got the tent ready and we all went in. Freddie zipped and locked the tent. A sensation of happiness came over me. I felt safe... like finally, _finally_, I belonged. I knew that I was wanted here, with my two best friends. Even when I lived with Freddie, I didn't have that feeling. Marissa hated me and she always will. But, Carly and Freddie are my closest friends. We had little food and money and no pillows or blankets, but I liked it. I loved it. And that's a lot coming from me.

"Why do you look all happy?" Carly asked, sitting up against the inside wall of the tent.

I took a deep breath, ready to tell her, but I didn't want to surprise her by going all deep-Sam on her. I barely ever showed her the deep side of me, and when I do, she tries to act like it's normal, and well, she's not too good at that. So I just shrugged.

Carly looked past me to Freddie. He was lying down, using the palms of his hand as a pillow with his elbows sticking out. His eyes were closed.

She then looked back at me and whispered softly, "Is it because you _love _Freddie?"


	14. Assumptions

**Chapter 14: Assumptions**

**Author's Note: Told you guys I would update fast! Thanks so much for the reviews. The more unique they are the happier they make me, even if they're negative. Oh, and thank you XxXSeddieFreakXxX. In your review you said that I did get a few of the lyrics wrong for Running Away last chapter, as I said "but I think that I've lost it" but it's really "but it seems that I've lost it". Thanks for pointing that out!**

**Review!**

**P.S. I'm using texting language in part of this chapter since they're texting, I think you all know well enough that I try to use good grammar xP. :D**

I felt heat on my face. Oh, Sam, why do you have to blush _now_? Of all times?

"So it's true!" Carly said excitedly. She whispered, "You're in love with Freddie!"

"Carls, it's... complicated," I whispered. "I don't want Fredweird to hear, can we text?"

Carly nodded. She took out her PearPhone and typed a text quickly on the touchscreen keyboard until my phone vibrated.

I read the new text from Carly saying: 'Are u in love w/ freddie?'

I sighed softly and texted back: 'I really dk, carly. I dont think so.'

Her next text said: 'Wait, ur actually thinking about it though? Eep!'

'I wasnt until his his rotten cousin amanda thought i liked him!"

'Whyd she think that?'

'No idea. -_-'

'Look... do u want my help to figure it out?'

I looked up at her in real life, seeing nothing but darkness but the brightness of her phone shining on her face. She was still staring at her phone though. I looked back at mine and texted back: 'Idk, i might but im tired and hungry so make it quick!'

'Ur hungry? Freddie bought food and u ate ALL of it!'

'Whatev just help me.'

'Ok... is he the first person u see when u walk into a room?'

I texted back: 'Ugh. Nvm, lets go to sleep.' I didn't realize she was going to ask cheesy questions like that.

'Is that a yes?'

'No, it's a 'idk, i never noticed.''

'Oh, haha. Well im tired too. Like exhausted. And i think freddie is fast asleep.'

I turned around to see Freddie asleep with that calm look he's had that I've noticed ever since I moved in with him. I turned back to Carly and smiled. "Night," I whispered, giving her a quick one-arm hug.

"Night," Carly whispered back. "I won't tell Freddie or anyone about this. Oh, and delete the texts on your phone. I'll do the sake. We don't want people to see."

I grinned. "Good call," I whispered.

We both deleted the texts and put our phones away. We laid down next to each other on the hard floor, me in between Carly and Freddie. It was uncomfortable, hard, and cold. No pillows, no blankets, nada. In about a minute I could tell that Carly was asleep by the steady pace of her breathing.

I sighed. I was tired, exhausted actually, but not tired enough to fall asleep in these conditions.

I kept shifting, tossing and turning, trying to see if there was one almost half semi-comfortable position for me to sleep in. I was making a lot of noise. Whatever. I had no choice.

"Just come here," I heard a tired voice of Freddie whisper. I turned to Freddie. He was laying on his side, facing me. His arms were weakly open, and I could tell that he was partly asleep.

I was confused, but for more comfort I'd do anything. I went into his arms and he gently put his hands on the tops of my arms, moving me so that my head was on top of his chest.

Freddie's chest was hard, nothing like a pillow. But for some reason it was really comfortable. Maybe it was just comforting. Big difference in my opinion.

The way his chest slowly moved up and down comforted me. I turned my head so that now I was still on Freddie's chest but I could also see his face. I let out a small smile. If I did end up liking him, I wanted it to be different. And honestly, there was no way that it wouldn't be different. I knew it'd be different, different from anything that I'd ever experience. The way I felt about him now, which I didn't completely understand, is a way that I've never felt for anyone else and that says something. I closed my eyes and finally fell into a deep sleep.


	15. Deciding Dream

**Chapter 15: Deciding Dream**

**Author's Note: This is going to be a pretty short chapter, (shorter than I thought it was when I wrote it in my notebook, haha), but I think you guys are going to like it anyway. :D (Here's hoping!) Review!**

_I was in a completely white room. So white, you could barely tell the difference between the walls and the floor._

_I was walking around in the seeming to be never-ending room when suddenly I noticed a long row of white chairs. In the chairs were guys. Familiar guys. They were all wearing all white, as was I._

_I slowly walked in front of each of the chairs, looking at each guy as I passed him. They all had completely serious, almost blank, facial expressions._

_I first passed Frankie Murkin, my boyfriend from when I was like ten or eleven. I then saw Noseby Moseby, the guy who I was only with because of free bacon. That's when I realized that in these chairs sat all of the guys I've ever been with, or had strong feelings for._

_I passed Jonah, Pete, Shane, Jake, and even Reuben. But a shock came over me when I saw the last guy._

_The last guy was Freddie. He was on a white chair like everyone else, but instead of wearing all white like the rest (including me), he wore a green polo shirt and dark, baggy blue jeans. His facial expression wasn't serious and blank like the rest either. He had a smirk on his face. And like all that isn't enough, there was a blindingly bright light behind him, making him glow._

_I grinned at him, and he quickly stood from his chair, smiling too. He put his hand on my cheek, and the moment he did that, all of my clothes turned colorful and bright too. I was now wearing a yellow and red tee shirt and red skinny jeans, instead of the all white I was wearing before._

_All of the other guys slowly disappeared, along with their chairs. The room was still completely white, but Freddie and I were wearing bright colors._

_Freddie kept his hand on my cheek, leaning down to my face slowly. So slowly. I puckered my lips, his face right in front of mine..._

I opened my eyes.


	16. So Close!

**Chapter 16: So Close!**

**Author's Note: Thanks so much for your reviews, guys. You guys are making fanfiction my favorite website EVER! But seriously, they mean so much. :D Enjoy the chapter!**

My eyes shot open, and I saw the grinning face of Carly right in front of me.

The dream I had last night came back and hit me in just a few seconds. I barely ever remember dreams when I become conscious. I guess this one was important.

I groaned when I woke up. "Carls, why are you right in front of me and all happy? You _know _I'm never in a good mood in the morning."

Carly turned around to see if Freddie was listening. I remembered falling asleep on him last night. I wasn't on him now. Weird.

Freddie was just leaving the tent.

"Where is he going? What if people see him?" I asked loudly.

"Chill, he's wearing the Glasses Cam and a bunch of layers of clothes, so he looks... you know... big," Carly explained.

"Where'd he get that stuff?"

"I guess he brought it."

I shrugged.

"But anyway..." Carly's big grin reappeared. "It seemed like you were getting some kissing action in your dream."

My face flushed. "Why do you say that?"

Carly mocked me, making an exaggerated face with her lips puckered, imitating me.

"I... I made that face?" I asked quietly.

Carly nodded, smiling. "Were you dreaming about Freddie?"

I slightly smirked. "Shut up, Carls."

"I'm serious!" Carly exclaimed. "I wanna help you figure out if you like him!"

I closed my eyes, thinking about Freddie. I opened them again, looking at a curious Carly, and I sighed. "He's a nub, Carls. I don't think me and him are meant to be."

Carly grinned. "I don't know," she sang. "Everyone always says that opposites attract!"

I rolled my eyes. Before I could respond, Freddie came back in. Carly and I both turned to look at him.

"Am I interrupting something?" he asked slowly.

I shook my head. I then noticed the Glasses Cam, which was a prop we used on iCarly before, on his face and his many layers of shirts covered by a big sweaty shirt. I chuckled.

Freddie just smirked. He knew why I was laughing. He took the glasses off and started taking the layers off until he only wore one shirt.

"Where'd you guy anyway?" I asked him.

"I wanted to see if everything's all police-y," he explained. "Near Bushwell Plaza there were some police cars. I could see them in the distance but I didn't dare go too close."

I took a deep breath. "Don't leave again, Fredward. If anyone's gonna leave the tent to check things out and buy stuff, it's me. Your mom is probably posting fliers of you everywhere, and Carly's dad obviously cares too. No one cares that I'm gone."

"You don't know that," Freddie said softly.

"Yeah, maybe people will figure out that I'm probably with you and Carly, so then they'll start looking for me too. But for now, no one cares."

Freddie frowned. He couldn't protest.

I glanced at Carly, who was staring at the blank wall of the tent with wet brown eyes.

I touched her arm lightly. "What's up, Carly?"

Carly turned to me. "Sam, you're my best friend and I love you, so please don't take this the wrong way."

I nodded reassuringly.

"Freddie and I shouldn't be here," she said. "Don't get me wrong... you absolutely don't deserve to be here at all... and I don't make decisions for Freddie, but I don't think I should be here."

"Why?" Freddie asked softly.

"My dad is being annoying. But I'm just being all stupid. Almost my whole life I got to just live with Spencer, so like, even though he took care of me and fed me and stuff, he was really unstrict. But really, everyone else has to live with a parent or two all the time, and I'm just not used to it. And now that I think about it, I was so mad because he didn't let Sam move in with me that I didn't even think about the real reason he came."

"He had a reason?" I sneered.

"Yeah," Carly said softly. Before we could ask what the reason is, she quickly continued to talk as if she didn't want us to know. She continued, "Anyway, this just doesn't feel right for me." She stood up.

Freddie and I stood too, almost in sync.

"Wait, so you're leaving?" I asked.

"Are you mad?" Carly asked, frowning.

"No!" I reassured her. "But you do realize that people are gonna know that you know where me and Freddie are, right?"

Carly sighed. "I... I'll lie to my dad. I'll say that somehow I knew you guys ran away and I was... uh... looking for you. Yeah... that works... and then I, um... didn't fnd you guys, but I was so tired that I, um, like passed out on a bench."

I shrugged, sticking out my lower lip and nodding in approval. "That sound good."

"But... I'm gonna have to tell Spencer the truth."


	17. And Then There Were Two

**Chapter 17: And Then There Were Two**

I wish I had some root beer in my mouth at that moment because I would've done a big spit take.

"Why?" Freddie and I asked loudly in complete unison, only to make us turn and glare at each other. Why the heck do we always have to do that?

"Because he knows me well, he'll know I'm lying," Carly said. The three of us were still standing, Freddie and me in front of Carly.

I bit my lower lip, giving her an anxious look.

"Don't worry," Carly said. "He was a teenager once not too long ago. He'll understand."

"Yeah, but he isn't gonna just sit back and watch everyone freak out about us without saying a word or worrying," I explained.

Freddie took a deep breath, nodding slightly in agreement. "Not to mention he's not the _best_ liar," he added quietly.

Carly looked upset at that moment, using her left hand to push back the front of her hair with her fingers. "I... I just wish I never did this. I feel hopeless. I just wanna go home, forget about all of this."

"But my mom kicked me out, Carls," I said softly. "And your dad came home. Nothing's ever gonna be the same. For any of us."

Carly swallowed hard. "I just need to go home. Please don't hate me. I'm telling Spencer the truth. I'll make sure he doesn't tell anyone."

"Good, 'cause you know if anyone finds out about this they're gonna come and force me into some home," I said. The thought of it killed me inside. To have to give up everything.

I saw a sad look on Freddie after I said. He touched the top part of my goosebumped arm lightly.

I saw Carly's mouth slowly curve into a smile. "Maybe Spencer can _help _you guys."

I started to sneer.

"Just listen," she continued excitedly. "He can bring you pillows and blankets... and food and money!"

Freddie sighed. He put his hand on her shoulder and said, "Thanks for the idea, Carly... but no thanks. Tell Spencer if you need to, but let's not get him into this. Okay?"

Carly nodded, but then she frowned. "But what about me? Can I help you guys?"

"This isn't gonna be forever, Carls," I said. "Don't worry about us. I won't hurt Fredpus..." I smirked, giving him a light pinch in his arm. "I mean, I won't hurt him too much."

Freddie smirked and rolled his eyes. He then put an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his chest a bit. "And I'll try to give her a little meat... somehow."

Carly looked through her purse, only to take out a hundred-dollar bill and hand it to Freddie.

"Oh, Carly, I can't take this..." Freddie said, staring at the money as if he couldn't believe it was real.

"I can!" I exclaimed, yanking the money out of his hand. I figured she had this kind of money still from the time she work at Groovy Smoothies. She kept that job for almost a week after she found out that she didn't need it.

"_No_," Carly said, grabbing the money away from me and giving it back to Freddie. "No offense Sam, but I want Freddie to be in charge of the money. For food and other emergencies only, got it?"

"Thanks Carly," Freddie said, wrapping her into a one-arm hug. "I'll pay you back when everything goes back to normal."

Carly smiled and nodded.

"If anything ever goes back to normal," he muttered.

I turned and looked up at him. Why was he here?

"Bye guys," Carly said. She spread her arms out wide in order to have a threeway hug.

After we all hugged, Carly unzipped the tent, showing the first patch of sunlight I saw that day. Carly stepped out of the tent and gave us one more sad smile. "Good luck," she whispered. She zipped up the tent and quickly walked off.

Freddie locked the tent. "And then there were two," he said.

"Benson, you need to leave. Now," I blurted.

"Sam, we already established that I'm staying no matter what you say," Freddie smiled. He sat down, leaning lightly on the wall of the tent.

I sat next to him. "Freddie, I eat in one day what you eat in three. The money won't last. We have to make a huge deal of just like... going to the bathroom. And we live in a tent. And we have one outfit each except for those shirts that you brought somehow. And we're gonna have to move around a lot and always hide. My reason for running away is because I have nobody and nothing. You have a great apartment at home with stuff and money and a big extended family and a mom who loves you. I get why you're here. You're trying to be nice. But you're being _stupid_. I hate saying long things like this, but you _have _to go."

Freddie wrapped an arm around my shoulders as we still sat next to each other, bringing me into him and making my head almost fall into his lap.

"I appreciate that you care," he said softly. "But... this might sound crazy, but it's kind of fun."

"So I say all that and you say you're having fun," I said. I picked up his arm from his shoulders and dropped it back on him.

"Sam..."

"Life isn't about fun, Benson," I said flatly. I stood up. I turned away from him.

I heard Freddie stand up too behind me. "Maybe not, but it makes the world go round," he said.

Still not facing him, I replied, "I believe that's _love_."

"Whatever," Freddie said. After ten seconds of silence with us both standing but me still not facing him, Freddie said, "Sam, look me in the eyes and tell me that you'd be happier on your own."

I turned around and looked him in the brown eyes. "I'd be happier on my own."

Freddie's serious expression slowly turned into a smirk, and then he laughed. "That wasn't fair, everyone knows you're the world's best liar."

"In the flesh," I chuckled.

Freddie smiled at me, bringing me into a hug. "We're doing this together," he said. I finally decided to hug him back.

Suddenly, someone knocked on, or scratched, our tent.

I quickly pulled away from Freddie. "Um," I nervously said in my over-exaggerated deep guy voice, "We're just campers."

"Sam?" the most terribly familiar voice asked.

I swallowed hard, whispering weakly, "Mom?"


	18. We Meet Again

**Chapter 18: We Meet Again**

**Author's Note: Wow. 17 chapters and over 200 reviews. Thank you guys so much. 200 reviews is the craziest thing. I read every review and they're all so great. I would respond to them all individually, but I think you want me to just get to the story xP. But by the way, thank you brown-eyed-blondie, I actually didn't know about the iStart a Fanwar thing until you said it in my revew. This year in school I've had so much homework, that lately I barely get any time to watch TV, so I didn't see that promo on TV. I looked it up on YouTube, and I'm so excited ! For those of you that don't know, in November there's going to be an iCarly move about Seddie vs. Creddie. I have a feeling that it'll end up on the Seddie side, but I'm just glad that this definitely means that there will be a LOT of Seddie in the episode. Nathan Kress also said there will be a lot of Creddie and Seddie. So I can't wait!**

**Okay, I'll shut up. I talk too much. Review!**

**P.S. (Sorry. :p) I wrote this chapter before iSam's Mom came out, (I wrote chapters when my computer was broken), except for the part where I describe what her mom looks like. So just imagine Jane Lynch as the mom xP. This is a long chapter, so have fun! :D**

"That's your mom?" Freddie whisper-exclaimed.

I nodded. "What do I do?" I whispered.

"Let's just... both go talk to her. I mean, you talk to her, but I'll be there if you want." He gave a small supportive smile.

I hesitated, but then I nodded. "Okay."

I swallowed hard, pushing my side bangs away from my right eye. I unzipped the tent and climbed out, Freddie right behind me.

I stood before the tall woman I call my mother. Her short blonde hair... a straight, short version of mine. Her blue eyes, identical to mine. I sometimes wish that she really wasn't my mother and they had a mix-up in the hospital, but unfortunately she looks too much like me. She looked the same, but there was a different look in her eyes.

"Sammy," Mom said smiling.

I immediately knew what was going to happen. My mom wanted me back. I swallowed and stayed strong. "Never call me that," I spat, anger filling me. "What are you doing here?"

"I heard that you and your friends ran away," she said, giving Freddie a quick glance. He stood behind me, a little to my right side. "I was looking for you."

"Why?" I asked slowly.

"What do you mean 'why?' I'm your mom," she said, smiling.

I folded my arms. "I don't think of you as my mother anymore, Pam. And how'd you find me?"

"A big tent in the middle of the park. Amazing hiding place," she said sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes, barely able to look at her.

"Come on Sam, what did I do that was so bad? We had a fight. You're a _teenager, _Sammy. It happens. And you know it's hard for me to have a good relationship with you. I just needed a little time away from you. But don't worry! I forgive you."

"_Yes_!" I said in an over-sarcastically excited way, throwing my fists in the air. "You _forgive _me! My prayers have been answered!"

"Oh, and I'm sure that living in a tent with _this _kid is much better," my mom said, referring to Freddie. "And the last time I checked, didn't you hate him?"

Freddie still stood behind me, a serious look on his face with his arms crossed.

"You never paid attention," I said. "And anyway, who I do and do not despise is none of your business. I'm not going home."

My mom found this... amusing? She chuckled. "Sam, you're living in a cold tent in a park pretending to be camping with _this _loser after running away from whatever rathole you were staying in. Wouldn't you rather be in a warm, cozy house with your loving mother?"

What she just said pierced me in the heart. "Warm? Cozy? Loving? Mom, you're lucky that I didn't wanna leave my friends and move to a group home, 'cause if I did, you'd be locked up for life." I quited down, frowning. "You hurt me, mom."

"You were annoying and obnoxious," Mom said. "I gave you a slight little hit like... once a year. It's _normal_."

"Okay, first of all, no, mom. It's _not _normal. And also, a slight hit once a year? Yeah, right. Mom, whenever you were drunk, which was _every night_, your hits were hard enough that normal people would've gone to the hospital from them. And the guys you brought home... don't even get me started."

Before she could answer, a guy came over to her. A familiar guy.

"Pam," he said, putting his arm around my mom's waist, "how long is this going to take?"

His voice. That scratchy, horrible voice. This weas Ernie. This tall, round-stomached man. And he was heavy and he smelled really bad. And his short gray beard was the only part of him wasn't sweaty and red.

My mom dated him before, when I was twelve. One of the very few times I was actually happy with my mom was when she broke up with him. He was the absolute worst guy she ever brought home. I won't go into details, but he was rough and tough and creepy. 'Nuff said.

"Sam, it feels like it's been forever!" Ernie exclaimed with a big grin. He spread his rms out wide. Wait... was he trying to _hug _me?

I backed away from Ernie, only to hit into Freddie. I almost forgot that Freddie was there because I was so freaked out about seeing Ernie.

I was next to Freddie, our shoulders touching. He turned to me and I turned to him. He looked me seriously straight in the eyes. He knew.

I sucked in my lips. I was unable to speak anymore. This was too much. I was lucky if I stayed conscious.

Freddie stepped up to my mom and Ernie. "Look at this girl," Freddie said softly. Ernie and my mom looked at me. Freddie continued, "Look at this deprived, traumatized, terrified sixteen-year-old girl." He turned to me and gave me a sad smile, then looked back at them. "She is stronger than the average grown man, and she's a sixteen-year-old girl just over five feet tall. Maybe she has a natural born talent of strength and fighting, but she wouldn't need to know if she didn't have to defend herself every day. Ms. Puckett, I don't know if you really love Sam and you're just a messed up person, or if you want Sam back for another reason. But either way, she's definitely better off without you. Nothing you ever do or say will ever make up for what you did to your daughter. Don't ever make any contact with Sam again. She will _not _go home. If you really care about Sam, or at least you're smart enough to get anything I'm saying, you'll walk away now without another word and never talk to her again."

My mom gave me one last look, a look that brought pain to my stomach, then turned and walked away, Ernie at her side.

"What?" I asked loudly to myself after they walked away. I turned to Freddie, who was smiling proudly to himself. "How?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"You got her to leave! And you said something really long! And I actually listened! And my _mom _actually listened!"

Freddie grinned and shrugged. "I don't know, I guess I can speak well when I'm passionate about something.

I looked at him, slightly smiling. "Passionate?"

Freddie shrugged again. "Let's get back in the tent."

We both went in, zipped the tent, and sat down on the floor of the tent.

"You know, you could say thank you," Freddie smirked.

"Thank you," I groaned like a little kid whose mom forced him to thank their granddad for some weird present.

Freddie smirked and rolled his eyes.

I smiled at him. "Really, that was an awesome thing you said. It was really cool of you."

Freddie smiled back. Suddenly, his cell phone rang. "It's Carly," he said after looking at his phone. He picked up. "What's up?" he said into the phone.

"Put it on speaker!" I said.

After Freddie put the phone on speaker, I said, "Hey Carls! You'll _never _guess what just happened." I was still in shock.

Carly chuckled. "Hey guys! You can tell me later what happened; sorry, I can't talk too long. I just wanted to tell you guys that I told my dad the lie. It worked. And Spencer backed me up because beforehand I told him the truth. But I called to say that Ms. Benson is having this like horrible panic attack. I swear, she's making herself sick of worry. She'll probably even take Sam back just to get her son back. You guys seriously need to come home."


	19. Halloween Tricks

**Chapter 19: Halloween Tricks**

**Author's Note: You know what I love about fanfiction over actual books? Well, there are actually A LOT of reasons, but right now I'm thinking of one thing: The fact that us writers know how the readers feel, and what they want. To be honest, I was going to make Sam and Freddie go right back to Freddie's house after this, but I got some reviews saying that they shouldn't go back, at least just yet, and if that's what you want. This will be a Halloween chapter (yes, it will be Halloween time for them too, although Halloween passed for us). It's gonna put twists in the plot that I wasn't going to add before, but now I'm glad. :D ****Hope you guys had a great Halloween!**

**P.S. Crazylady, I liked the idea you had in your review, but I've actually set the future for this fanfiction already and that just might not fit. I was going to inbox you... but you don't have an account! Haha, but if you get an account we can talk about it and maybe I'll make a story or one- or two-shot about it!**

**P.S.S. Thanks omgwtfEmily for the info on iStart A Fanwar but I already saw the second promo :p I stalk Dan on youtube and blogspot. Haha so yeah.**

**P.S.S.S. Sorry for the really long author's note, but here's the thing. I'm planning to a new Seddie story called iEmotions. I was going to start it after this story ended, but iGet Kicked Out won't end before iStart A Fanwar. My problem with THAT is that I'm sure a bunch of Seddie stuff is going to happen in iStart A Fanwar, which is awesome, but the way that iEmotions is is set in the way that Sam and Freddie are together _now_. So if something big happens between Sam and Freddie in iStart A Fanwar, I can't start a new fanfic after that already happens. (You follow? :p) So, I'm probably going to start the story before iStart A Fanwar, so like, what do you guys think? I'll tell you guys what it's about next chapter, and maybe you guys could try reading it if I post it before then :). Thanks for reading this boring thing. Now read! :D**

**Review!**

Freddie lightly touched the "End Call" button on his cell phone. We were still sitting and leaning against the side of the tent. It seemed to be silent for a few seconds, as Freddie stared at his cell phone and I breathed slowly, looking around and wondering if he was considering what Carly said.

And then he finally spoke. "What are you thinking?" he asked softly.

I turned to him. He was still looking at his phone, but when I looked at him, he looked back.

"That you should go home and I should move to Canada and live a happy life on my own," I said with a completely straight face.

"_Sam_..." Freddie looked at me. I frowned at him. He probably knew I didn't want him to go. But he probably knew even more that there was no way I'd go back. Not yet.

Freddie seemed to completely disregard the idea of going home. He wasn't going to even try anymore. "You know," he said, "it's Halloween." He let out a small grin.

"I know," I chuckled.

There were a few seconds of silence, until I had the most amazing idea, I swear a lightbulb could've appeared over my head. I mean, honestly, anyone could think of the idea but Freddie and I were so caught up in the mess we were in that we didn't even think about it.

"We should go trick-or-treating!" I exclaimed.

Freddie laughed. "And what would our costumes be? Homeless teens?"

"No," I chuckled. "It would work; we're wrecks, but we should fit in and not seem suspicious."

"Well how are we supposed to get costumes now? It's Halloween _today _and we only have a hundred dollars. And that's supposed to be for food and emergencies only!"

"_Freddork_," I said, rolling my eyes. "Can't you see? If we trick-or-treat for long enough, we could get more candy for free than we would buy for a hundred dollars... and we'd just spend some money on some cheap costumes. We'd still have some cash left!"

Freddie smirked a little. "You're serious about this?"

"Yeah!" I exclaimed. "There's a costume store right nearby. It's the late morning or early afternoon, so there's still gonna be some reject costumes there!"

"Reject costumes," Freddie chuckled and rolled his eyes, as if he wasn't serious about this idea.

"Come on, it'll be fun!" I said excitedly. "And I'm supposed to be the pessimistic one here! Lighten up!"

Freddie looked into my eyes. "You know, I haven't trick-or treated for a couple years now, but..."

"But?" I grinned.

"But," he said, smiling, "I'll trick-or treating with you _if _the costumes aren't too expensive."

"They won't be," I grinned. "Awesome! I'll go to the costume store and buy both of us costumes. You stay here."

"Why?" he asked.

"For all we know your mom could be putting up fliers with your face. It's a big possibility. They could recognize you, but not me. Okay?"

"Okay," Freddie said, handing me the money, "pick out something good." Freddie smirked. "Please don't get me a dorky costume."

"Nah, I want you to have a costume that would really disguise you," I said. "You're a dork everyday, we might as well let you be something different today."

I saw Freddie smirk and roll his eyes before I stepped out of the tent, zipped it up, and walked over to the costume store.

* * *

I walked into the costume store to see a bored-looking dark-skinned woman with a high ponytail sitting by the counter. She was probably bored because not a lot of people come to the costume store on Halloween day. Most people like to buy their costumes way in advance.

Her face brightened up when she saw me. She stood up straight and gave me a big white-toothed smile. "Hi, welcome to Party Forever Store! All of our Halloween costumes are at a discount today. My name is Victoria. How my I help you?" She stepped out from behind the counter and stood in front of me, seeming restless because she had nothing else to do.

"You guys got any Halloween costumes left?" I asked.

"A few, but..." She stepped out of her enthusiasm for a moment. "You _do _know Halloween is today, right?"

"I'm aware," I muttered.

"Okay!" Victoria exclaimed enthusiastically again. "Well, how many costumes are you hoping to buy?"

"Two. One for me, and another for a guy my age."

"Alright! So you two are probably hoping to look in the teenage or adults costumes. You could probably fit into either. I'm sorry that we don't have many costumes left, so I'll just give you the choices. For boys in teenage costumes, we have a green power-ranger costume, and a spiderman costume. We have the power-rangers one in all sizes, but the spiderman one in only extra large." She showed me pictures of both of the costumes.

I snickered, imagining Freddie in either of the costumes. "Well, it's tempting," I said quietly. "But uh, no. He'd kill me if I got him the power-rangers one... or attempt to kill me. And the spiderman one wouldn't fit him."

"Oh, alright, well for girls for teenagers, the only costume we have left is a fairy princess costume." She gave me an awkward grin, as if she knew that that was the last costume I'd ever wear.

"Do I _look _like I'd wear that?" I rolled my eyes. "Show me the adults' costumes."

"Alright," she smiled. "For men, we have no costumes left, sorry. But for women, we have sexy cop, sexy pirate, and sexy sailor."

"That's it?" I asked angrily.

"Yeah," Victoria said, wincing a bit.

"Why does everything have to be sexy these days?" I asked, annoyed. I sighed. "Well, sorry. I guess I'll have to look somewhere else."

"Wait, there's one more costume," Victoria grinned. "There is a couple costume for adults. It seems like it could be your size."

"A couple costume?" I asked. "Like... a costume for couples?"

"Uh... yeah," Victoria said, seeming scared that I'd reject it again.

"What is it?" I asked.

"The man is a devil, and the woman is an angel," she said, showing me the package of the costume with the picture in the front. It was in Freddie and my sizes. I looked up at her, giving her a small smile. "How much is it?"

* * *

"This is so ironic," Freddie laughed as we started walking on the sidewalk to trick-or treat. We were both in our costumes, and they'd fit right. We changed into our costumes in bathrooms at some fast-food restaurant, and we ate a little cheap, fried and yummy food. We also washed our faces and all in the bathroom. Now I had enough energy to trick-or treat the night away with Freddie, in our couple costume.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Sam. You're in an angel costume and I'm in a devil costume," Freddie chuckled.

"I have _no _idea what you're talking about," I joked with a grin. We were using the bags of each of our costumes for our trick-or-treating bags. The costumes came in the same box, but when you open the box there are two bags in there: One for my costume, and one for his.

Freddie and I went house to house, block to block, street to street, filling up our bags with so much candy and chocolate. We ate, talked, and laughed all along the way.

"I guess this is dinner tonight," Freddie laughed as we brought our now heavy bags to the next house. "I'm getting tired, though. And it's getting dark. We should head back, go to the houses we missed on our way back."

"Yeah, sounds good," I grinned. We walked up to the porch of a light brown house. Three young kids were just walking away from the house, and I noticed that they got these giant chocolate bars from her. Giant.

"Yes! Jackpot!" I exclaimed, grinning. The person at this house was handing out huge candy. I rang the doorbell. A tall woman with a cheerful smile, pale skin and short light brown hair answered the door. She flinched a bit when we saw us, as if something about us surprised her. I shrugged it off.

"Hi, kids! Sorry, I just ran out of my candy," she said.

I frowned angrily.

"But," she said cheerfully, "I've got a whole other bag in the kitchen! Be right back."

I grinned widely. My eyes followed her into the kitchen, and then I saw something that surprised me on a milk carton she had on the counter. Luckily I have good eyes, so I looked closer onto the milk carton and that's when I saw.

I saw Freddie's face on the milk carton.

Freddie's mom posted Missing Child ads on milk cartons.

"Freddie!" I whispered, quickly nudging him and pointing to the milk carton.

Freddie squinted a bit, looking at the milk carton, when he saw the Missing ad of himself. He looked at me, wide-eyed.

"Run!" I exclaimed. "Then hide! Maybe she didn't notice."

"Okay!" Freddie exclaimed. He started running, then he turned around. "Aren't you coming?"

"In a sec, but I want a giant chocolate bar from her. I'll meet you there."

Freddie nodded, then ran.

I wondered why it was taking the lady so long to find her other bag of candy. I then heard quiet, faded speaking in the house. I listened closely.

"Hi, 9-1-1? Yes, I've seen news about a missing sixteen-year-old boy, Fredward Benson... right. Him. Well, I think he just came to my house to trick-or treat."


	20. Escape

**Chapter 20: Escape**

**Author's Note: Thanks so much again for your reviews, guys. :D Now, who saw iStart A Fanwar? I don't want to give too much away because I'm sure some of you haven't seen it, but basically, I'm sort of disappointed. Nathan Kress said that there would be major Creddie AND Seddie in the episode, and there really wasn't. It was a good episode and all, great and funny like all iCarly episodes, and I loved seeing the faces of the characters of some of Dan's old shows, but there wasn't much Seddie or Creddie. There was actually more Creddie than Seddie in a way, because it seemed that most of the audience was more into Creddie. The only real "major" Seddie moment was when we figured out that Sam and Freddie know that people want them to be together. I mean, yeah, there was a tiny Seddie moment or two, but not what I expected. :p I wanted some kind of results. Not like by the end Seddie being together, because that would be too fast, but I wanted some kind of hint of Seddie. Anyway, I'll stop complaining. Dan's just keeping us in suspense. :p**

**P.S. I have a new poll on my profile, but more importantly, my new story, iEmotions came out! There have only been 2 chapters, so it'd be easy to catch up! After reading this chapter, go to iEmotions. Trust me. (:**

**P.S.S. I'm listening to The Great Escape by Boys Like Girls as I write. :p And my iTunes is on shuffle. Complete coincidence. Irony?**

**P.S.S.S. This is a nice, long chapter for you guys. Hehe. It took me a while to write but I'm pretty sure that you guys are gonna like this one. Review! :D**

Ha. That lady thought that if she talked quietly, I wouldn't hear her. But, yeah, I'm not ladylike and polite, but I've got a darn good nose, eyes, and ears. I took a few seconds to wonder what to do: Should I stay and let her give me the candy, then make a run for it with the slight chance that I may make it before the cops catch me? Or, should I play it safe and run away with Freddie. For Freddie. I sighed when I realized that the second choice was right. I had to pick Freddie over chocolate.

That's pretty hard for Mama to do.

I almost broke a sweat, although the night was chilly and windy, because I got nervous. It takes a lot to get me nervous, but I was. I ran, trying not to let out any kind of shriek or squeal. I couldn't find Freddie.

I'd told him to hide. We didn't discuss where.

I ran the way that he ran, almost in tears. _I can't do this_, I thought. _I can't always be on the run. This whole time, without realizing it, I've been worrying about Freddie. But he's been worrying about me. We can't do this anymore. It's too much._

"Sam?" I heard a familiar whisper. I turned to the right, where the voice came from.

Freddie.

I swear, although it hadn't even been five minutes since I'd seen him, I felt like it was a lifetime. I didn't want the police to get him in trouble. It's not fun. Trust me, take it from someone who knows. Freddie couldn't handle jail. I barely could.

"Sam? Sam, are you okay?" Freddie whispered, pulling my wrist into his hiding spot in between two buildings as if he knew that we needed to hide.

I pulled him into a hug without thinking. "I'm sorry, Benson," I said quietly.

"Why?" Freddie said, seeming worried and pulling away. "What happened?"

"The lady," I said, "she called the cops. She recognized you from her milk carton."

Freddie widened his brown eyes. "What are we gonna do?" he worried, pacing.

I looked at him. "Run?"

Freddie smirked a bit. "Really?"

"Yeah," I said, getting energy back. "If we run enough, then she had no proof. It could have always been someone who _looks _like you."

Freddie grinned. "Come on," he said. "Let's go to the next costume store. There's one nearby. Let's buy the cheapest thing there, no matter what it is, and even find some makeup or something. That way if she says I was wearing a devil costume, I won't be wearing it anymore."

I smirked. "We're a good team, Benson."

Freddie grinned, and then we sprinted as quickly as we could. I heard faint sirons. The police cars were coming to the lady's house. I ran as fast as I could, remembering running this fast on Easter with Freddie. When everything was simple. When everything was good.

We got to the store. We quickly rushed in. There were a couple of other people there. We pushed past them and found these very cheap T-shirts. They were in the costume section. I took a second to look at them. The shirts were in the couple costume section, go figure. And go figure even more, they were matching light pink shirts. The one for the girl was a V-neck that said in red "I heart him". (Of course, it didn't say heart, it actually showed a heart.) And the guy's was the same, except the neckline was higher and it said "I heart her".

I looked at Freddie. The shirts were so cheap. We had to. Luckily, we'd brought our jeans in our candy bags with us (we brought all of our stuff), so after we bought the shirts we quickly changed into the shirts and jeans in the store's bathroom.

After we did that, I saw the teenage girl at the counter doing her makeup in a small mirror in front of her. Without asking, I grabbed her makeup bag and put ridiculous-looking, overdoing-looking makeup on Freddie and me.

The girl's mouth opened wide. She looked angry. After I finished with our makeup, I gave the girl a small shrug, then grabbed Freddie by the wrist and ran out of the store with him.

"Where do we go now?" I asked, almost out of breath as we kept running.

"I have an idea," Freddie said, seeming to be completely out of breath, "but you'll hate it."

I was a little nervous to see what his big idea was, but I trusted him. "Okay. I'll follow you."

We kept running. I followed Freddie. We reached a train station.

A _train station_?

"Really, Freddork?" I asked, annoyed. "Really?"

"What, you got a better idea?" he asked.

I sighed. We went into the train station. "A lot of people come and stay at this train station," he said quietly. "We've just gotta hide. We can pretend we're waiting for some three AM train or something."

I nodded. This was a disgusting train station. No benches, just a dirty floor. And trust me, I've been to a bunch of disgusting places before, but I can still call this place disgusting.

"You want us to sleep _here_?" I asked.

"Yeah," Freddie said. "We'll fit in. It's dark here, too."

"Yeah, but what about our tent?" I asked. I frowned. "We can't have a tent, can we? We'll be too obvious."

Freddie sighed, frowning a bit. "Yeah, I guess. But we'll be okay. We'll find a comfortable-looking corner somewhere." He spoke with just a bit of sarcasm.

We found a dark corner. There actually were other people sleeping here. "Uh, Sam, we should take turns staying up and making sure that no one steals our stuff or comes and, you know... attacks us."

I groaned. "Fine. But I'm tired. You watch first."

"Okay," Freddie said with a small nod. He gave me a small smirk as he said, "So, how are we gonna sleep? Same position as last night?"

I widened my blue eyes. "You were conscious?"

"Of course!" Freddie laughed. "You think I offered for you to come sleep on my chest in my sleep?"

I smirked at him. "So... is that a real offer?"

"Yeah," he said. I couldn't completely tell because it was dark, but I think his face slightly turned red. "It was actually comfortable. You were like my blanket."

I felt myself blush a bit too, and then I was glad that it was dark. "You were like my pillow," I said softly after, then smiled. A second after I wondered why I was being like this.

Freddie looked me in the eyes and smiled. We stayed like that for a few moments. "So," he said. "Sleep time?"

I nodded. We were both cold. I felt my coldness, of course, but I could tell that he was cold by his goose bumps and the way he shivered. _This is gonna warm him up_, I thought.

Freddie lay on the cold, hard floor. He looked really uncomfortable. My teeth chattered loudly as I wondered how I was going to approach him without being too weird about it. I awkwardly rested my head on his chest. I saw his shirt, and smirked as I remember that his light pink shirt had the words "I heart her" on it.

"What?" Freddie asked, catching my smirk.

"Nice shirt," I said.

"You too," Freddie said, smirking back. My teeth chattered more, and I started to shiver a bit. Freddie looked at me. "You seem cold," he said.

"Yeah, well, I'm in a freezing train station in October at night," I said.

Freddie looked at me as if he was thinking. He then lightly, awkwardly, wrapped his arm around my back to warm me up. He was cuddling with me. It was... strange. But it helped. I warmed up.

I made a decision that I knew I'd either regret later or regret it if I didn't do it. I wrapped my arm around the top of his shoulders because he seemed cold too.

"Thanks," Freddie said tiredly, acting like it was no big deal that we were two sixteen-year-olds lying in a train station, doing what we got in trouble for doing in the first place. But the difference between us now and the time we got in trouble for cuddling was because now it was our choice. The other time we started cuddling when we were asleep.

I guess a lot has changed in my relationship with Freddie without me noticing it.

"Hey, no sleeping," I said to him, smirking. "Wake me later," I said. I closed my eyes. The movement of Freddie's chest and the light feeling of his breath against me comforted me again. A wave of exhaustion came over me. I held Freddie tighter, not thinking about how his mom felt, how Carly felt, how anyone felt. Just me. Just Freddie. Just us.

I took a deep breath and bit my bottom lip hard. I really, really, _really_, didn't want this to happen.

But I was almost completely sure that the words on my shirt were totally, one hundred percent true.


	21. A Second Chance

**Chapter 21: A Second Chance**

**Author's Note: Okay, so the past thing from the Halloween chapter up until now were not planned, but I'm actually really glad that I added them. (I added those chapters for you guys because you didn't want them to go home). Most of this chapter is something I'm just writing now, but the end of it will be the stuff I wrote when my computer is broken. :p Review!**

**P.S. There's a special character in this chapter who is a character in iCarly but is never in this story D:. I love this character, and I needed this character in this chapter anyway, so here you go! ;D**

**P.S.S. For those of you non Spanish-ers, Vamanos means let's go (I couldn't put the accent over the a), and si means yes (again, no accent :p). **

I woke up to the loud sound of a train going by. My eyes widened, and the first thing I saw were brown eyes of Freddie on mine. "Sorry, did I wake you?" he asked softly.

"Nah," I said. I realized his arms were still around me, and mine were around him. I lightly pulled away from him, feeling an awkward sensation of coldness because I was so used to his arms around me, and sat against the wall of the train station next to him. "Is it my turn to watch?"

"No, it's morning," Freddie said, pointing to a train schedule that showed the time. It was 9:47 AM.

"Wait, did you stay up all night?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. I couldn't believe it, because I was still tired after having a full night of sleep, but I couldn't imagine how he must've felt lying on his back on this cold, hard floor of the train station with a sixteen-year-old girl on top of him for ten hours.

"Yeah," Freddie said, with a slight shrug. He winced after shrugging his shoulders, as if that pained him. He massaged his own shoulder for a moment.

"Why?" I asked, almost angry that he didn't wake me because I thought he was going to blame it on me.

Freddie gave an "it's-not-a-big-deal" look to me, with another small shrug. "You just looked calm, that's all. I didn't want to wake you. It wasn't worth it."

_Ugh! _I thought. _Why does he have to do this to me? _"Oh," I said. That was all I could say, because I felt my face become red again, and I turned away, pretending I was looking at something else.

"Hey Sam?" Freddie said, still sitting next to me. He spoke excitedly, as if he had an idea. "I've been thinking a lot throughout the night. We're at a train station. We've been here for a long time and no one caught us."

"So?" I asked slowly, almost afraid of what he was about to say next, because I'd predicted that one of us would mention this idea, but I was hoping that he wouldn't think of it.

"So, if we can get through a night here without getting caught, we can probably get through a whole train ride," Freddie said, grinning.

"To where?" I asked nervously, my voice becoming loud and high-pitched because I'd considered this idea in my head but I disregarded it because I decided it was too far-fetched.

"Anywhere," Freddie said, grinning even wider. He crawled in front of me, his bright eyes looking into my eyes so happily that I felt as if I couldn't disappoint him by rejecting this idea. "We can start a better life, the two of us! Come on!"

I wideend my eyes, and let my instincts come over me as I picked my hand up and slapped him hard across the face.

Freddie rubbed his now red cheek, gaping a bit. "Ow!" he said loudly, then looked at me for an explanation.

"Start a life?" I asked, sort of angrily. He was acting like we were together. Boyfriend and girlfriend or something. "Benson, what about school? What about friends? What about getting married and having a family? What about your mom?" I was surprised at the small feeling of my heart dropping, because a part of me thought that this idea was the best thing in the world. But I couldn't. Even I know sometimes when I'm going too far, and this was one of those times. If I felt like this idea would work out, I would jump right on it. But sometimes I need to be the one with the common sense. We couldn't afford to buy a place, we were too young and uneducated to get real jobs, and we were _not _going to be hobos the rest of our lives.

Freddie closed his eyes lightly and took a deep breath. "I know," he said softly. "I know. But... it just feels hopeless. I feel like we should just take a risk."

"We already did," I said softly. "And I know, Benson. I'm regretting this after every step I take." I even regretted saying that to him after I did. "Let's just hang in here for a second until a chance comes our way. We'll know a good chance when we see one." I couldn't believe I was being the calm, comforting, and smart one for once.

Freddie nodded. He smiled at me and sat back next to me. "Sorry for getting you into this whole mess."

"Don't even," I said with a sigh. "If it's anyone's fault other than my mom's, it's mine." I couldn't believe I was admitting this. I kept trying to forget the fact that I might have been in love with him, but after everything I say, I realize I'm speaking in a way that I wouldn't speak in with anyone except for Fredward Karl Benson.

Freddie gave me a sad smile.

"Freddie? Sam?" I heard a familiar voice say. I looked up in unison with Freddie to see a familiar and slightly chubby face. I grinned widely and almost squealed when I saw him standing there. Gibby!

Any piece of our old life made me happy.

"Gibby!" I exclaimed quietly. I yanked him down by his wrist so he'd sit in the corner with us, because we were still hiding. He was holding a blue suitcase, but after I yanked him down he pushed the handle of the suitcase down and held the suitcase in his lap.

"Freddie, Sam, what are you guys doing here?" Gibby asked softly. His hazel eyes were wide and he seemed shocked to see us. He leaned on the wall next to us, me sitting between the guys.

"Hiding," Freddie said with a shrug.

"Guys, some lady claimed she saw you guys trick-or-treating yesterday," Gibby said. "It was on the news. But I know you guys wouldn't do something that stupid."

I turned my head to Freddie and gave him a sheepish grin. "Yeah," I said slowly to Gibby after turning back to him.

"Anyway, you guys should seriously go home. Everyone is freaking out about you guys, like there have been announcements in the school and everything. And your mom is seriously freaking out. The other day, she barged into our house at three in the morning to see if we know where you are. Three in the morning! During my night bath! Really, guys, go home. Why did you guys even run away?"

"Well, she kicked me out of Freddie's house," I said quietly, ignoring his 'night bath' comment. I never really talked to Gibby about what happened with me living with Freddie, although I was almost positive he'd heard it in school. It was just a known thing. But I decided to mention it anyway to confirm it anyway. "I moved in with Freddie because my mom kicked me out, and now Freddie's mom kicked me out. I was gonna run away by myself but Freddie insisted on coming." I gave Freddie a small angry glare, but I didn't mean it because by then I finally knew how empty I'd feel without Freddie by my side.

"You guys haven't seen Freddie's mom though!" Gibby exclaimed. "She hasn't slept at all! She would probably take you back, Sam! She would do anything to see Freddie again!" Gibby almost seemed angry.

"Okay, fine, we'll think about it," I said, getting annoyed, because there was a part of this that I think only Freddie and I understood. No one else got that if Freddie's mom would _not _let me back in, my life would be ruined forever. "So why are you here anyway?" I asked, sort of annoyed that he came and interfered. I get annoyed a lot, on case you haven't noticed.

"Going on vacation to Yakima with my mom," Gibby said with a grin and slow nod as if saying: "Yeah. You wish you were me."

Freddie and I exchanged confused looks. "Well, you have fun with that," Freddie said with a tiny bit of sarcasm, his eyebrows raised.

"Oh, I will," Gibby said, grinning and standing.

"Oh, and Gibby," I said, and he turned his head to face us one more time.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"Don't tell anyone," I said with a serious look on my face.

Gibby hesitated before slightly nodding, and my stomach felt queasy, realizing that the fate of my life was in Gibby's hands. I saw him run off to find his mom, and Freddie and I hid our faces as they walked past us again so that Gibby's mom wouldn't see us. We watched them board their train and I saw Gibby sit in the seat by the window. He gave us a nod, and the train went off. I frowned, even that slight movement hurting me.

Freddie turned to me. "So what do you think?" he asked.

"About what?" I asked.

"Going home."

"Sure, have fun," I said, nudging him a bit.

"You're coming with me," he said. "C'mon, Carly and Gibby _both _said that my mom would take you back."

"They don't know your mom," I said. "Even _I _know your mom better than them."

Freddie gently, very lightly touched my arm and I turned my head to look him in the eyes. "What if I promise you'll be safe?" he said softly.

"Define safe," I said flatly.

"Home. My home. With me. Pretending to eat my mom's disgusting nutritional food. Staying up until two AM watching stupid movies. Having all the strange deep talks that we wouldn't have even imagined before any of this happened."

Somewhere in there I cracked a grin. I noticed that familiar pattern in his eyes, realizing how comforting he had always been. "That was kind of fun, huh?" I said sotftly.

He smiled and nodded. "So what do you say? Vamanos?"

"Si," I said, grinning.

We stood and walked quickly out of the train station, looking down a bit so that no one would see our faces too clearly. We double checked that we had all of our stuff as we stood outside of the train station.

"Let's get out of here," I said. I stared at Bushwell Plaza in the very far distance, afraid of what came next. I then turned to my side and looked up at Freddie, and I took a slightly relieved breath. More than anything right then, I knew that Freddie would do anything to keep me safe.


	22. Reassurance

**Chapter 22: Reassurance**

**Author's Note: Thanks so much guys; your reviews were extra sweet and made me extra happy this time around! :D A couple of you who seem to speak fluently in Spanish corrected me in your last reviews, and I'm sorry about that. :p I'm just a student in Spanish. But you both told me different things, so I'm just leaving it, ahaha. Review! :)**

**P.S. Vote for the new poll on my page! :D**

There we were, in front of the Benson apartment. I'd been in this hallway hundreds of times; and it felt so familiar, but different at the same time. When I used to come here, I was happy and sort of excited to go to Carly's or Freddie's house. Now my life was about to change, probably for the worse.

"You ready?" I asked Freddie, so quietly it was almost a whisper.

Freddie took a deep breath and nodded, seeming to be just as nervous as I was. He slowly picked a shaking fist up to knock on the door three times.

Not even half of a second passed until the apartment door swung open to show a tall, wide-eyed woman.

"Freddie?" Marissa whispered, keeping her mouth open after she talked because she was so shocked. She lightly touched his cheek as if she was trying to figure out if he was actually real. She then quickly pulled him into a hug, her mouth still slightly open.

After a long hug, Marissa fiercely pulled away from Freddie. She then yelled, "Fredward Karl Benson! You had me worried sick! Searching through every end of Seattle..."

I stopped listening after that. She just kept babbling on and on...

I slowly walked through the open door into the Benson apartment. The two of them also subconsciously walked in while Marissa yelled, but they kept their eyes on each other.

I rolled my eyes at her. All I could hear was her voice. I rubbed my temples in a circular motion.

The apartment door was still wide open, so I shut it, making a 'slam!' sound.

Marissa's head sharply turned to me after the door closed, and she finally stopped yelling. She squinted, glaring at me as if I was the most evil person ever.

"_You_," she whispered in the most creepy way, pointing a bony finger at me. "You forced my innocent son to run away with you."

_So much for her letting me move back in_, I thought. I looked at her, ready to fight back. "Actually I _didn't_," I said, getting angrier and angrier as I spoke. "The whole time I was trying to get him to leave and he refused. But whatever. I'm done." I was filled with rage as I walked toward the door. I didn't know where I was going, but I'd rather be anywhere but here. I was done with Marissa always blaming everything on me.

"Sam, wait," Freddie said softly. He grabbed my arm, stopping me from walking.

I yanked my arm out of his grip to roughly knuckle angry tears out of my light eyes. I looked into Freddie's sad, worried eyes. We made long, quiet eye contact.

I then turned to Marissa and spoke my mind. "_Look_, Marissa. I _know _you don't like me and I'm not gonna try to make you. But I'm a kid, Marissa. Sometimes I don't feel like one and I'm barely ever treated like one. But I'm a kid. I _know_ you don't want me to live here. I _get it_. But the thing that happens if you don't let me move in is I'll go to foster care or have to get a job and take care of myself or be on the streets or whatever happens to sixteen-year-olds. You'll probably be happy to get me out of your way, but like I said before, I'm a kid. I'm sixteen, and adults always say sixteen was one of their best years. But if I have to go to a group home and give up everything and everybody that I love, which really isn't that many people, then I'll have no reason to live. And don't think I'm trying to get your pity. And I'm _truly sorry _that I was born with a bad mom. But wherever I'm sleeping tonight determines if my life is worth living."

Yeah, yeah, I know. That's a lot of words for Sam Puckett. Did I really mean that I didn't want to live if I didn't get to move in with them? Honestly, I don't know. It depended if I was really going to go somewhere else. I'd sort out my thoughts later, when everything fell into place.

Marissa just looked at me, and her look reminded me of the time when Freddie told me how much his mom really cared about me. I'd completely forgotten about that.

Maybe Marissa did too.

"Mom, I've never heard Sam talk like this before," Freddie said softly. "And she hates sympathy. She means it. And this all happened because Sam and I fell asleep in the same bed. She and I are _friends_, mom. I'm not gonna just sit back and let her life be ruined. _Please_, mom." He walked next to me and put an arm around my shoulders.

Marissa took a deep breath, closing her eyes and opening them. She looked down, not looking in our eyes. "You know this is hard, Sam," she said, so quietly I could barely hear her. "Ever since Freddie was born... or... or maybe ever since his dad passed away, my life has been devoted to making Freddie's life perfect and safe. I just don't want anything to happen to him." She looked back up at us, seeing Freddie's arm around me as I was almost in tears. She continued, now looking in his eyes, but still speaking to me, "But now I know that if I make you go, something will happen to Freddie. He'll be sad."

Freddie's face turned slightly red, and then Marissa looked at me. "And you obviously care a lot about Freddie," she said. She slightly smiled. "You wouldn't hurt him."

I grinned. _She's saying yes, she's saying yes, she's saying yes! _I thought.

"You can move in," Marissa said, not seeming too confident as she said it. "But we're going over more ground rules later."

I let out a small shriek, showing Marissa the biggest smile ever to thank her, and Freddie pulled his other arm around me, so now he was embracing me. I was almost enjoying the warmth of being in his arms- which I also find kind of sickening -until my cell phone rang. I pulled away from him and looked at the phone.

"Who is it?" Freddie asked.

I looked up at him, my eyebrows slowly narrowing. I couldn't believe it. I almost forgot about her.

"Melanie."


	23. My Other Half Sort Of Pt 1

**Chapter 23: My Other Half... Sort Of**

**Author's Note: Hey hey heyyyy. Sorry the first part is very writer's-block-ish. But the longness of the chapter should make up for it, hehe. Review! :p**

"Melanie's calling?" Freddie asked, his eyes wide. "Does she even know about you getting kicked out?"

"I didn't tell her," I told him, staring at my phone, still ringing as Melanie called.

"Wait, so this means she's real right?" Freddie asked stupidly in a joking way.

I rolled my eyes and spoke quickly. "Yeah. It's a long story... but long story short, me and Carly never lied, except for when we gave in and said Melanie wasn't real. We only said she was fake 'cause you wouldn't give up. Now shh, I'm answering."

"Hello?" I said after answering the phone.

"Sam?" Melanie asked, her voice more high-pitched than mine like usual, which didn't make sense considering we're twins. She sounded excited.

"What's up?" I asked casually.

"Guess where I am now!"

"Some fancy place in LA?"

"Nope! I'm in an airport here in Washington! I just need to take a quick ten minute train ride, and I'll be right nearby! Surprise!"

My jaw dropped a bit. "Have you, um, called mom?"

"No," Melanie said, seeming a little bit disappointed that I didn't react to this in an excited way. What did she expect? "Why?" she asked.

"Don't. Um, I'll be there in a few." I sighed quietly.

"Cool, I can't wait!" Melanie exclaimed.

"Yeah, yeah. See you soon." I hung up.

"She's here?" Freddie asked just after I hung up.

"How'd you know?" I asked him.

"'I'll be there in a few'? 'See you soon'?" Freddie said. "She's at the airport?"

"Yeah," I said, not in the mood for this. "But she has to take a train ride. We have to go pick her up."

"Why is she here?" Freddie asked slowly, seeming nervous as if he assumed Melanie knew.

I shrugged. "A _surprise_," I said while rolling my eyes.

"How should we get there?" Freddie asked. "Should my mom drive us?"

"Nah," I said, wanting to hang out with Freddie's mom as little amount of time as I could. "I guess we can take a cap there, but we should walk back. We've got a _lot _to tell her."

* * *

"Mom kicked you out?" my twin sister asked me in shock. Her curly blonde hair was in a ponytail, and she wore a white blouse and pink shirt. Freddie and I picked her up after going over some dumb ground rules with his mom. No hugging, cuddling, or touching after nine PM. No falling asleep in each other's beds. Five servings of vegetables a day. Gosh, does Freddie have such a different life than I did at home.

I stuffed my hands into my dark purple hoodie's pockets, walking on the sidewalk back to Bushwell Plaza. Melanie was walking to my left, with Freddie at my right. "Yeah," I said. "A while ago."

"And you live with Freddie?" Melanie asked, surprised, taking this in.

"Yup," Freddie cut in.

"Wait... does this mean I'm kicked out too?" Melanie frowned.

"I don't know... wouldn't it be kind of awkward if you weren't?" I said, starting to feel angry that she would be on my mom's side.

"Sam... she's my ma," Melanie said miserably.

"Whatever, Mel. Ignore the fact that she abused me and that she tried her hardest not to be drunk when you came to visit."

Melanie turned to me with a sad look. "I'm sorry, Sam... and I'd probably have to go through the same thing if I lived at him. But... I need to talk to her."

I sharply turned my head to her. "How?"

"I'll call her when we get to Freddie's place... or your place... you know what I mean."

I nodded slowly, my eyebrows raised high. "Yep."

* * *

Marissa and Melanie met, and Melanie was acting all sweet and polite. She makes me sick.

After they met, Marissa walked into her room. But on her way there, she whispered to Freddie, "Now _that's _the kind of girl I want you to be friends with." She then walked back into her room, thinking I couldn't hear a thing. Either that, or she whispered it a little louder than a normal whisper because she _wanted _me to hear it.

I frowned. I remembered that now she even hates Carly too since Freddie saved her life. As if that was Carly's fault.

I guess Melanie didn't hear her, because after she put her stuff in Freddie's room, she was already doing something on her cell phone. She then looked hesitant and worried, pacing around the kitchen area. The kitchen area was sort of like the main room in Freddie's apartment, because it was the room you're in when you first walk into the apartment.

I looked over Melanie's houlder onto her phone, that she was holding extra tightly. Our mom's number was dialed in, but Melanie didn't call her yet.

"Why aren't you calling?" I asked, getting annoyed and impatient. I stepped back from over her shoulder, and then stepped in front of her.

"I'm scared," she admitted. She stopped pacing and her blue eyes looked into my identical ones. She continued, "You know I don't want to go back to her. You know I hate what she did to you. But Sam... this phone call will change my life. Like... where am I supposed to stay when I come home for the summer?"

"With us," Freddie said. I turned to his serious face, and we both slightly smiled.

"But like... what about her custody? Did you guys make this legal?" Melanie asked, still unsure.

"Nope," I said. I shrugged. "She's probably scared to bring it to court. She knows I'd be able to prove that she abused me."

"But if she does," Freddie added, stepping over to stand right next to me so my shoulder touched the top of his arm, "bring it on. Carly and I will be right by Sam's side, and I know you will too, Melanie."

Melanie's frown slowly turned into a confident grin. "Okay. I can do this." She picked up her phone and quickly called our mom, as if doing it before she regretted it. She put the phone to her ear. After some seconds, she said, "It went to voicemail."

"You can call her back later if you want to have a conversation," I said. I knew that if it was me, I'd rather yell at her over the phone than yell through a message that my mom might never listen to.

Melanie hesitated for a quick second, but then shook her head. "No. I never want to hear her voice again."

I smiled, seeing a bit of Sam rage in her as she said that.

I heard a beep come from the phone, and I knew that that meant Melanie's message was about to start. Melanie said into the phone with all of her emotions clearly coming out as she spoke, "Hi mom. It's Melanie. I heafrd about what you did to Sam... everything. Everything that happened since I left for boarding school. I know that you kicked her out. I know all of the terrible stuff that happened before that. I hope you know that means you kicked me out too, whether you like it or not. Mom, I never want to see you again. The act you've given me as such a 'great' mom is gone. You can't do that to my sister and expect me to not find out, and to not car.e And if you're thinking of bringing this to court, bring it." She smiled at us. "But be prepared to lose. You hurt my sister, and I was lucky enough to not get hurt by you since I wasn't home. But mom, you disgust me. Bye." Melanie was grinning widely as she shut her phone.

Melanie looked at Freddie and me. Her grin slowly turned into a frown, her bright eyes turning small and wet. She looked down and her face became red. Tears poured out of her eyes and she made a squealing sound. Just like that, she was crying.

Melanie looked back up and pushed her bangs out of her eyes. Her face was red and wet and sad. Do I really look like that when I cry? Thank God I don't cry that much. Well... I didn't until I moved in with Freddie.

I sighed quite loudly and opened my arms lazily, ready to to unhappily comfort my upset sister with a hug.

But instead, Melanie walked right past me, into the open arms of Freddie.

She went on her toes and rested her head on his shoulder.

Just like I do.

He rubbed her back gently and whispered, "It's okay. I know this was a big step, but you did the right thing."

Comforting her, just like he does to me.

I cleared my throat, but neither of them even glanced my way. They were ignoring the rest of the world.

Just like Freddie and me.

I gave them one last glance and shook my head. I slowly walked into Freddie's room and sat on the edge of his bed. I stared at my knees. I couldn't believe I thought for a small second that Freddie could have had just a bit of feelings for me. Yeah, right. He's just like that to all girls.

I should've known.


	24. My Other Half Sort Of Pt 2

**Chapter 24: My Other Half... Sort of Part 2**

**Author's Note: Sorry that it took me longer than usual, guys! I've been very busy, and I still am at the moment (there are things I should be doing right now, but I'm not :p) but I felt like I should update! I can't believe I have over 300 reviews already. Thank you, every person who has ever read and reviewed this story. In the last chapter's reviews, some of you told me how you felt for Sam, how you felt bad for her, or even that you cried a little. Not that I'm glad that you guys cried, haha, but that means so much to me that my story touches you guys so much. It makes me feel like I'm doing a good job! Anyway, Merry late Christmas, Happy New Year, happy Chanukah (I'm not sure if I said that while it was going on), happy whatever you celebrate, and review!**

**P.S. I was at first going to make this whole Melanie thing one chapter, but that would be really long. So, I was going to make it 2 parts, but it's even longer than I expected, so it's going to be a three-part thing! :D **

"Hey," I heard a voice identical to mine say. I quickly looked up, as I was sitting on Freddie's bed looking down before, to see Melanie standing in the doorway to Freddie's room. She walked in and sat next to me. She sat up completely straight with no trouble, her hands uneasily moving around on her lap. She wiped one last tear off of her face, as she was crying before because she just ended her relationship with her mother. "Sorry about that little episode. I guess it was sort of a... shock. My life is changed, Sam. Forever."

I laughed bitterly. "Yeah. _Your _life is changed. But Melanie, you're gonna go back to your fancy boarding school soon, where everything's gonna be the same and great. You'll have the same dorm advisors and teachers who care about you so much, and smart roommates and friends. Not being with the Puckett family won't make a difference. Me, on the other hand, I'm stuck awkwardly being here with the _Bensons_."

"I know... I'm sorry, Sam." Melanie slowly turned to me. Her serious look crept up into a smile. "But I'm surprised you're complaining. Freddie just gets cuter and cuter!"

I sneered. "Are you _blind_?" I said in complete seriousness, not thinking at all about if I agreed with her or not.

"No, _you _are," she giggled. I rolled my eyes. I looked into her eyes and her smile got bigger. "Actually, maybe Freddie is," she said.

"Freddie is what?" I asked.

"Blind. I mean, how does he not see the way you look at him?" Melanie said as if it was obvious.

I really hope my face didn't turn bright red at that moment, because that would totally blow my cover. Whatever my cover was. I mean, I was still figuring out how I felt about Freddie. Melanie was right for once, though. Freddie was kind of cu- ew, shut up Sam! "What are you talking about?" I asked.

Melanie sighed. "Never mind. I guess if you say you really don't like him, then you don't. Nobody knows better than you."

"_Thank _you," I said. Oh God, Freddie's cousin that I barely know suspects this, then Carly, and now Melanie? Is it that obvious that I might like Freddie? I mean... Carly _is _my best friend, and Melanie _is _my twin, but...

A thought came into my head. I swallowed hard. What if Freddie knew? Freddie's smart, and he lives with me so he knows me well. He's seen me in almost all of my emotions. Happy, sad, ecstatic, distraught, furious, confused, scared... and in love?

I shivered at the thought, and made a note to myself in my head to step up my game of making fun of him. Unless that makes it more obvious. I let out a small groan over the confusion running through my mind, forgetting that Melanie was in the room with me.

"Is everything okay?" she asked, concerned.

I swallowed and nodded.

Melanie looked confused for a moment, but that was a short look. She stood up and fixed her skirt, wiping invisible dust off of it. "Well," she said, finding a mirror in the room and putting on some glossy lip gloss, "if you don't like Freddie, that means I'm gonna get my flirt on!" She rubbed her lips together before making a smacking sound with him. She practiced her flirtatious smile at herself in the mirror.

I rolled my eyes. "Have fun," I said, trying to act like I didn't care with all of my strength and will power.

Melanie walked out of the room, and I sneakily crawled out after her to watch her flirt with Freddie. I hid myself behind a counter.

"Hey Freddie," Melanie said flirtatiously, smiling at Freddie after she arrived in front of him in the kitchen.

"Hey, is Sam okay?" Freddie asked.

Melanie seemed frustrated because he immediately brought me up, which made me smirk. "Yeah, she's fine."

Freddie smiled, relieved, but then he started to look confused as Melanie started to twirl her blonde hair flirtatiously.

Melanie touched his shoulder lightly. "I was just wondering... maybe we could pick up right where we left off?"

I rolled my eyes, holding in an annoyed groan.

"Where was that?" Freddie asked in an almost flirty way, which killed me inside.

"Right about here," Melanie said, bringing her lips closer and closer to his. She did it ever-so-slowly, in a way that convinced me that my life was going in slow motion.

I shook my head. I felt hot, angry tears in my eyes, which confused me even more. I ran into Freddie's room. I couldn't, and didn't, watch the moment of the actual kiss. I couldn't bare seeing their lips touch, so I didn't. Melanie doesn't know Freddie. Not like I do.

I stared into space, sitting on Freddie's bed again. Freddie was not only the first guy I kissed, but he's also the _only _guy I've _ever _kissed. He's kissed Melanie, Carly, and probably a bucket load of other girls. But that one kiss with Freddie was my one and only kissed. I haven't kissed anyone in over two years, since I was fourteen. Freddie just goes around and kisses everyone.

After a minute or two of hearing Melanie and Frederly mumbling to each other, and me being too lazy to try and listen, Melanie came back into Freddie's room. "Hi," she said softly, sitting on his bed next to me.

"'Sup," I said flatly.

"Not much... um... are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" I said, avoiding looking into her eyes.

Melanie looked into my eyes for a few seconds, even though I wasn't looking back at her. I saw her in the corner of my eye. "Oh... you saw Freddie and me, didn't you?" she asked.

"No."

"_Sam_."

"Okay, so I saw you guys flirting. So?" I said.

"Sam. You're my twin sister. We don't talk that much, but I know you better than you think."

I eyed Melanie angrily. "No. You know nothing about me. We look identical, but you and I both know that we're nothing alike."

Melanie became a little bit feisty now, in a way that surprised me and reminded me that she _was_, in fact, my sister. "You're right," she said. "We _are _nothing alike. Our personalities _are _different. You're a tomboy and I'm girly. You're tough and I'm weak. But that's not what I'm talking about. We're the same inside, Sam."

I looked at her, and I let out a smile. I guess, since we were twins, something about us had to be alike. Inside? Not our brains that told us what to do... but our hearts? I guess it was possible.

"I know you deep inside," Melanie continued, and she seemed to brace herself for her next statement. "I know how you look and act and talk... when you're jealous."

My smile instantly disappeared. "Jealous?" I yelled, hoping that Freddie didn't hear me from wherever he was. I quieted myself down, speaking in almost a whisper now. "Of what?"

"Of Freddie and me. He and I went on a date, and we flirted, and you're jealous." She sounded almost happy about the idea of me being jealous. I was surprised at her. I looked into her eyes, and I saw a look of pity on her face.

"Look, Melanie. I might be kind of mad, but I'm not jealous," I said, not even liking to say the word.

"What are you mad about?" she asked, the look of pity still on her face.

"I'm mad 'cause..." I looked at her and sighed, deciding that I wouldn't lie. I said in an angry voice, venting to my sister for what seemed like the first time ever: "I'm mad 'cause he likes you! I mean, you guys like each other so much... And like he barely knows you! This is only the second time that you guys met and you're already like in love! He always falls for your type... girly, sweet, giggly and weak."

Melanie paused for a few moments, and then said softly and gently, "Sam?"

"What?" I almost shouted, rage still in me.

She spoke gently, the annoying look of pity turning into a look of sorrow. "You just completely described jealousy. I mean, you didn't say 'I'm jealous', but you didn't have to. You're mad because Freddie always likes girls like Carly and me and girls similar to us. You're mad because you want him to like you, because you love him more than you realize. You might know deep down, but the inner Sam won't let you accept it. But you are, Sam. You're jealous."


	25. My Other Half Sort Of Pt 3

**Chapter 25: My Other Half... Sort of Part 3**

**Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews, guys! And to Mari13ssa: I'm glad you don't want Freddie to overhear, because I was afraid that some people would want that, and I like listening to what my reviewers want but if Freddie heard that would kind of ruin my flow. Haha. Have fun reading the last Melanie chapter! :D**

**P.S. I love how there's like no Seddie interaction in these chapters but somehow they're still very Seddie. Haha**

I stood up and stared at something; I don't even remember what it was because I was taking in what Melanie said so much that I couldn't think straight. Me? Jealous? I thought that was about the last thing I could ever be. She did have a pretty good explanation, unfortunately.

Of course, being wrong and admitting it isn't really who I am. "Whatever," I mumbled angrily. "Why don't you just go back to kissing Freddie? I know you already did that so many times."

"Sam, what are you talking about?" Melanie asked, sounding confused, but I still didn't look in her eyes. "Freddie and I have only kissed _once_."

"What?" I said in almost a whisper after whipping my head around to look at her.

As she spoke, I slowly sat down next to her again. She explained, "We kissed that one time when he took me on a date after we first met. He and I kissed once, _you _and him kissed once."

I gave Melanie a look, as if asking her how she knew about Freddie and my kiss.

"Carly told me."

"Carly," I whisper-grumbled to myself. "But wait, you kissed him today!" I exclaimed. I was completely confused, and I felt like that was pretty much the emotion of my day. Confusion was everywhere.

"Oh, you mean _that_," Melanie said, understanding, nodding and slightly chuckling with a white grin on her face.

"Yeah, _that_," I said, becoming really impatient. What, did that long, romantic kiss just not count? Was she just going to hide it from me?

"Sam, we didn't kiss," Melanie told me. She didn't seem confused at all that I even knew about it, as if she knew I was watching them.

"Yeah, you did!"

"_Sam_. Listen to me. Did you see the exact moment of the kiss?" she asked slowly as if I was stupid.

"No. But I left right before your lips touched," I said angrily. She couldn't hide this from me just because she was trying to be a good sister since I was supposedly 'jealous'.

"Yeah. You left at the exact at the exact perfect time, right before Freddie _rejected_ me," Melanie said in a serious voice, a small smirk on her face.

I widened my eyes. Well, I did _not _see that coming. And I didn't hide my shock. "What? Why? What'd you do? What'd he say?"

Melanie smiled that disgusting 'sweet, innocent' smile. "He said that there's this girl that he likes and he would just ask her out but he's scares. And that he's like terrified about the fact that he likes her in the first place. I'm surprised that he told me so much. He seemed like he was relieved to tell someone."

"Yeah, he was talking about Carly," I mumbled.

"Oh, no, I don't think so. I forgot to say... he also said that he just realized that he liked her recently or something like that. And he's still adjusting or something... he said a lot of stuff, but I was too upset to listen because he rejected me." Melanie smiled, and she looked truly happy, not jealous. I felt like she actually... she actually cared about me. Like, that she was glad that if Freddie had to like someone other than her, she was glad it was me (if it was, which I still sort of doubted).

I swallowed hard, wishing that she listened to more of what Freddie said. I tried my hardest not to think about it too much. I knew that if I thought about it too much, I would come to the conclusion that Freddie liked me, even though it was most likely not true. I'd made assumptions like that before, then I would realize that I'd assumed wrong.

I looked at myself next to Melanie in the mirror that happened to be against the wall across from where we were sitting. We're identical twins. But I always feel like she's prettier than me.

I looked at my frizzy hair falling past my shoulders in a curly, messy way. Hers stayed somehow perfectly neat, and the curls almost looked like she'd curled them at a salon that day, while they stayed in her perky ponytail. We had the same eyes, but hers were wide and bright, while my eyelids drooped a bit in a bored way because that was just who I was. She sat up straight while I slouched, and it didn't feel right to me to sit up straight.

I made myself stop comparing myself to Melanie for now. Heck, I just figured out that a guy might have picked me over her. And not just any guy: Fredward Benson.

I let my muscles loosen and just flopped on Freddie's bed on my back, with Melanie still sitting up straight with her hands on her knees next to me.

I closed my eyes, and let myself smile as big as I wanted. There was a tiny chance that Freddie liked me. Not that that makes me smile... I don't like Freddie or anything... oh, who am I kidding?


	26. Sickness

**Chapter 26: Sicknness**

**Author's Note: I loved the reviews from last chapter! :D Thanks so much guys! And sorry that I've been slow updating... a lot has been going on lately that I can't really explain. (And by the way, sorry if the beginning of this chapter is a bit gross to you guys) (Don't worry now, it's nothing bad xP). Review!**

I woke up in the morning to the very pleasant sound of Freddie puking.

Melanie had stayed stayed with us for a night, but then had to go quickly. Since it was the beginning of summer, she was going on vacation with her best friend and her best friend's family for a long time over the summer. This was the day after she left.

Oh, right, back to Freddie puking. I know, if you were me you'd probably run to see where Freddie was to see if he was okay. Well, I'm Sam. And the sound of him throwing up woke me up approximately two hours before I wanted to.

I closed my eyes again, trying to fall back asleep and pretend that nothing happened, but then I heard Freddie puke again. I groaned quietly and forced myself out of bed. I slowly walked from my cot to the doorway of the bathroom. In our bathroom, I saw Freddie breathing heavily, leaning over the toilet.

"Uh... are you okay?" I asked awkwardly.

"Yeah, I love this," Freddie said weakly, able to be sarcastic even at his worst times. That made me slightly smile. He explained, not turning around just on case he had to be turned to the toilet, "I think this is from something I ate. From that new fast food restaurant you _insisted _we should sneak out and try last night."

I grinned, remembering the fast food from the night before. It was really greasy and all of the food tasted fake and rubbery. Best place I'd ever been. His bad attitude to it annoyed me, although he _was _throwing up after all. "Well _sorry_, you want me to hold your hair back or something?" I joked.

Before he could answer with one of his "witty" comebacks, Freddie threw up in the toilet again. I sharply turned my head away in disgust. Him throwing up reminded me of the way my mom was, every morning after drinking too much the night before. That pretty much meant every morning, ever.

"Where's my mom?" he asked weakly from behind me, as I was still turned away.

"I'll get her..." I said awkwardly. I walked out of our room into the kitchen. I saw Marissa in a red checkered apron, cooking yolkless scrambled eggs in the oven... Yeah, I don't get it either.

"Good morning, Sam," Marissa said sort of flatly, not in a cheery way like she used to. She barely made eye contact with me as she spoke. She still didn't like me, though Freddie and I had been following the new stupid ground rules well. We'd been eating our fruits and veggies, and I barely even saw him after nine o'clock. She still hated me though, but I was pretty used to it. She was slowly putting some eggs into the oven.

"Um, hey," I said awkwardly. I sneered as I looked at the very non-appetizing looking eggs on the pan. Succinctly, I said, "Just to tell you, Freddie's puking in the bathroom."

"WHAT?" Marissa screamed. She threw everything she was holding in the air, and quickly ran past me into Freddie's and my room. Somehow she ran so fast that she didn't get to see the wonderful sight of the pan of eggs falling upside down on the floor, yolkless eggs flowing around the floor.

I slowly turned away from the sight of the eggs streaming around the brown tiles. I walked into the doorway of the bathroom to see Marissa kneeling next to Freddie, rubbing his back lightly. It brought me flashbacks of the times I'd gotten sick in my childhood, when I lived with my mom. And she kicked me away from wherever I was getting sick, telling me to get over it.

I shook my head quickly and took a deep breath. Those times were over. Sure, Marissa sort of hated me, but she would still be there if I got sick.

"Mom, I think it was something I ate," Freddie told her. I widened my eyes, and after just one glance at me, Freddie widened his eyes too, realizing he shouldn't have said that. Marissa didn't know that we snuck out to go to that fast food place. Key words: _snuck out_. She would never have let her precious Fredward go to that place. I'll never get why.

"All you ate was my gluten free dinner!" Marissa exclaimed.

Freddie hesitated before saying, "Well, after I ate that mushy broccoli, my stomach did start to hurt."

I smirked. _Good job, Freddork, _I thought. _She didn't find out about us sneaking out, _and _she might never give us that disgusting broccoli again_.

Marissa stood. "Freddie, I'm going to go get your special medicine," she announced after quickly deciding.

Special medicine? Need I ask? Probably not. I was used to this stuff from living with the Bensons.

"No, mom, you don't need to." Freddie stood up and placed a hand on his stomach. He glanced at me, then back at his mom. "I just ate something bad. Trust me, I'll _never _eat it again." Freddie gave me a longer look after that; it may have lasted a couple of seconds. There was a slight smirk on his face, but not one that his mom would be able to catch.

"Fredward Benson, I'm getting your special medicine and that's final." Marissa wasn't one to give in that fast.

"Mom, the only store that has my 'special' medicine is all the way in Yakima. It's not worth it. I'm _fine_."

Marissa ignored him. She stomped out of the room, and I heard her feet make a loud sound after every step. She grabbed her pocket book and other things. She called from the doorway of the apartment, "I have my cell phone fully charged! If you need me, call me! If I don't answer, call 9-1-1!" And with that, she was gone. I took the next couple of seconds to laugh hysterically as Freddie glared at me.

Freddie groaned. "This is so dumb," he complained. "I feel better, now that I got that-stuff, I can't even call it food-out of my system. A good brushing of my teeth and flushing of the toilet and it'll feel like none of that drama happend. And half of that is done. Now, I just need to brush my teeth for... say... a half an hour and I'm all good!" Freddie grabbed his green tooth brush and started to brush his teeth.

I chuckled. "Frederly, I can't believe you're actually surprised. It's your mom."

Freddie shrugged, not being able to talk as he brushed his teeth.

I sat on my cot. I could still slightly see Freddie in the bathroom through the bathroom mirror from where I was sitting. I stared at him and thought about all that we'd gone through, but how we still acted the same as always. Our relationship was... weird, but it was kind of nice.

Freddie noticed me staring. "Wha?" he asked, through a tooth pasted mouth (so I guess he couldn't properly say 'what').

"I'm just... thinking," I said, looking down at my knees, covered with light blue jeans, for a moment.

"Abow wah?" he asked, and I figured he was asking 'about what'.

I smirked, looking back up. "The fact that I've survived a few months with the _Bensons_."

Freddie smirked through his toothbrush. "Amih ih, you uv ih." Decoding what he was trying to say was getting annoying, especially because I wasn't sure if he meant 'admit it, you love it' or 'admit it, you love me'. I didn't answer that one, because whatever he was trying to say, he was probably right.

* * *

Later that day, when we figured Marissa was probably almost home, the home phone in the kitchen rang.

Freddie walked into the kitchen and I followed behind him, bored from doing nothing but talking to Fredweird for hours, and hoping to be able to eavesdrop on Freddie's conversation with whoever was calling.

Freddie answered the phone quickly and put it to his ear. I put my head right next to his head with the phone between our heads so I could hear who was on the phone and what they were saying.

"Hello, is this Fredward Benson?" It was an unfamiliar, sophisticated sounding woman.

"Yes," Freddie seemed confused. "That would be me. Who is this?"

"Hi. I'm a receptionist from the Hospital of Seattle. Don't be alarmed, but your mother was just in a car accident, and she just checked in here moments ago."


	27. Deja Vu

**Chapter 27: Deja Vu**

**Author's Note: Hahaha I love your reviews, guys. But I'm sorry to tell you, you guys have no idea what's in store ;) So just sit back and enjoy this SUPER LONG, and VERY INTENSE and QUITE DRAMATIC chapter! I know, the suspense is killing you (; Review! :D**

Freddie's breath seemed to stop. All I could hear in the apartment was my own breath, and I tried to quiet it down from the awkwardness.

I stepped back from Freddie a bit, and looked at him. His eyes were wide, and expression didn't change at all. His grip on the black phone loosened so it fell on the hard, brown tiled floor. Still frozen in his shocked position, he barely seemed to notice that he dropped the phone.

I gave him a "really, Freddie? Really?" look, but he still remained unchanged. I scrambled down to pick up the thankfully unbroken phone quickly, for the receptionist was still on the phone. "Hello?" I said into the phone, unsure if the lady was still there.

"Hello? Who is this?" the lady seemed confused.

"Sam, I live with the Bensons," I groaned, not in the mood to explain myself at a time like this.

"Oh, well... hello," the lady greeted. "Well, if you don't mind, please inform Fredward that his mother was in a car accident, if he didn't get that before. She was hit by a drunk driver, who is being searched for right now. Ms. Benson will be just fine, but she has suffered from a few injuries. She can come home very soon, but she will have trouble walking and will have to take some time off of work. Visiting hours aren't over, and you may come visit. Ms. Benson will have to stay the night here, but she will return tomorrow. She has called a babysitter to watch Fredward tonight."

"A _babysitter_?" I yelled, as that was the only thing she said that affected me.

"Yes," she said, her tone staying the same.

I sighed. "Alright, whatever, we're coming soon. Bye, lady," I said flatly.

"Goodbye, have a nice-" I hung up before she could finish her nonsense.

"Uh, Freddork, your mom..." I said, but trailed off. I didn't know what to say. Today was absolutely _not _Freddie's day. He woke up puking, his mom left to get medicine he didn't need, we sat around for hours doing nothing, and he found out that his mom was in the hospital. And knowing him, he probably felt guilty that his mom got into a car crash because he was the reason she was driving, even though he didn't want her to.

"I know," he finally spoke, which made me relieved that I didn't have to explain this to him. He swallowed hard, and actually turned his head. "I heard everything she said."

"At least your mom's okay," I said with an awkward smile. "So, um... you wanna go see her?"

After a slow nod, Freddie said seriously, "Sam... it's all my fault."

What'd I tell you? "Fredweird," I sighed. "You're not the drunk driver. It's his fault, and they're looking for him right now." Freddie was about to speak, but I cut in before he did because I knew what he was going to say. "And it's not like you asked her to drive. You told her _not _to. It's not your fault, Frederly."

Freddie gave me a sad smile and nodded, but he didn't look convinced. Eh. I tried.

* * *

Freddie and I visited Marissa in the hospital that night, but she was asleep when we came, and the nurses said she needed rest so we just left. Freddie seemed really upset the whole time. I saw real tears in his eyes, which I hadn't seen since the night we visited his dad's grave. He had a real passion for family, one that I figured I would never understand.

We spent the night with an annoying, fat old babysitter who barely spoke any English. Therefore, I messed with her, saying big English words that I'd hear Freddie say before just to confuse her. I mostly did it because I'm Sam and that's just my nature, but I partly did it to get Freddie to laugh. All I got was a fake smile or two. He was really upset.

The next day, Marissa came home. She took a van cab, but Freddie wanted us to wait in the parking lot of Bushwell Plaza so we could help her in. The moment she stepped out of the cab, Freddie ran over to grab her hand. I slowly walked behind him, seeing him taking his mother's shivering hand. And again, I saw tears reform in his eyes.

I sighed, and inside my head I groaned, because Freddie gave me a look, and I knew that meant that I had to help too. I let Marissa put her arm around me, and I felt her shaking against me. I could tell that Freddie was shaking even more, but he seemed to be trying not to.

The taxi driver got out of his seat and took Marissa's new portable wheelchair out of the cab. We helped Marissa into the seat, and Freddie gave the taxi driver a sad thanks before the man drove away.

Freddie wheeled Marissa into the building, taking the ramp up into the place. I silently followed behind them, my hands stuffed into the pockets of my plaid hoodie. In a way, I understood why Freddie was upset. As in, I understood it, but I still thought he was crazy for thinking that way.

When we got to their apartment, Marissa sat in her wheelchair at the table, eating a small snack. I got a good look at her; she was banged up. Her face was bruised, and she had a broken left leg, a broken right arm, and a sprained left wrist. She had more various injuries now, and the doctors said that she was suffering back and neck pain. I wouldn't know, because we still hadn't spoken a word since she arrived back home.

"Would you guys like to eat with me?" Marissa's weak voice said from the table. She seemed to try to turn her head to us, but let out a small "ow" under her breath, and I realized it was because of her neck.

"Mom," Freddie whispered, sounded even weaker than her at the moment. "I would love to... but can I have a moment first?" His voice cracked during the word 'moment', and I knew that he was just about to really cry.

"Of course," Marissa said, not taking the risk of turning away. I wondered if she knew how much Freddie was hurting because of this. I wished she would just tell him, reassure him, that she was okay and it wasn't his fault.

I was surprised to realize that this may have been one of the first times I'd felt compassion and completely cared about Freddie. Sure, I thought his reasons for being sad were really stupid. But, I really hated seeing him this distraught. All I wanted was to see his smile again, to know that he was happy and his normal cheerful self. That was weird for me. I wasn't usually like that, but now I finally understood what it felt like to care this much. I truly felt for the guy.

Freddie gave me a nudge, and then motioned with his head towards our room. I realized that 'the moment' he wanted was probably a moment to talk to me. I gave him a sad smile and nodded, and we slowly walked into our room. Freddie let me walk in first, and then he shut the door after following behind me. He sat on the edge of his bed, and I sat next to him, and there was silence in the room. I heard his calm breathing, but it turned into fast-paced breath. I turned to him, and he was looking down to his knees, almost literally crying.

"Frederly..." I said softly. "Freddie... she's okay. It can only get better from here. She's healing."

"Sam..." Freddie's voice was quiet and almost high-pitched. "I can't do this... I can't live with this guilt. I'm so selfish... Everything bad that happens to my family, it's all my fault."

"What makes you say that?" I said, unsure if that came out in a mean way or gently. I was trying to be as gentle as possible, but I'm not the _best _at that.

Freddie looked up to me, straight into my eyes. I looked straight back into his red and wet eyes, as I noticed a couple of tears about to escape from his eyes. But as always, his eyes were so interesting to me... almost what I could call 'amazing'... Oh, shut up Sam.

"Five years ago," Freddie whispered so softly I could barely hear him. "Five years ago, I had a little stomachache. And going to buy me stupid medicine, the same one that my mom was going to get yesterday... my dad died. My mom got seriously hurt for that exact same reason." He looked at me more deeply in the eyes. "Whatever I did... I don't know why God has to punish my family for this. But it seems so big that it's so much of a coincidence. Why can't _I _just be in a car accident instead?"

"Freddie..." I whispered, finally understanding his point. This was almost the exact same situation he was in when his dad died. No wonder his reaction was so huge when the receptionist called. Without a thought, I wrapped an arm around him. It was awkward though, because we were still just sitting on his bed.

Freddie stood and I stood with him, and I gave him a real hug, my arms around his chest and his around or a little above my waist. He seemed to be holding me close, and he was shaking a bit. I figured he was crying.

"I don't want her to die, especially because of me," he said quietly. "I'm lucky she didn't die this time. It doesn't mean she won't next time... and I can't do this to my family. This is going to keep happening. They're better off without me."

I pulled away from him a bit, my arms still around him but just more loose. I felt like I had to comfort him, like he always did to me when I was upset. But I didn't know how. I decided to some kind of mixture between saying what I really thought, and saying what he wanted to hear. "Freddie, there's _no _way you're some kind of 'curse' on your family."

Freddie looked unconvinced.

"But," I said, deciding to say what he wanted to hear, "if by some weird chance this _was_ some kind of message from God, I think it'd be over by now. It happened to both of your parents, your direct family. You don't have any brothers or sisters. Maybe it's over. Maybe it won't happen again."

Freddie took a deep breath, closing his eyes lightly, seeming to be considering it. Tears weren't falling out of his eyes anymore. "I guess that makes sense. But that doesn't necessarily mean it's true... Sam, you know I'm not going crazy, I mean I know that there isn't some weird curse in me. But I just feel like somehow this is too weird to be a coincidence. But the thing is... I love my parents so much. But they aren't the only people I love, and they aren't my only family. I have a big extended family. I even have people who feel like family to me. People who I care about so much. And what scares me the most is..." Freddie stopped talking. He slowly pulled himself away from me, and he took a slight step back.

"Is what?" I asked, trying to sound gentle, but I may have sounded just the opposite; I probably did, knowing me.

"Something in me tells me that the next person I'm going to unintentionally hurt with my stupid sickness will be _you_."

I was confused for a second, wondering why out of all the people he could think was next, he thought me. He thought he was somehow hurting the people the most close to him, and I guess he thought of me as someone that close to him. "Freddie..." I said softly.

Before I could go on, Freddie turned his head to the doorway. I followed where he was looking, and saw Marissa sitting her wheelchair in the doorway. She wheeled herself over. Freddie and I were already apart, not hugging anymore, which was good because she still kind of hated me and me hugging him probably wouldn't help.

"Is everything okay?" Marissa asked, looking at me, then Freddie. Probably with her motherly instincts, she could immediately tell he was crying. "Freddie, what's wrong?"

Freddie gave me a sad smile, and then walked over to his mom. "Nothing, mom. Everything's just fine." He knelt beside her and lightly kissed her bruised cheek.

Marissa winced a bit just from the light kiss, but she smiled afterwards, probably because she figured everything was okay. She wheeled herself in, sitting beside Freddie's bed. "Freddie, I promise I will be _just _fine. The Bensons can get through anything."

Freddie smiled the most fake grin I'd ever seen on him. I knew he hated seeing his mom hurt. "Let's just hang out here for a while. I'll go get us some drinks." He walked out the bedroom door towards the kitchen. I sat on the edge of his bed.

Marissa gave him a sad smile, but after she left, she eyed me angrily because she couldn't turn her head very much without pain. "What happened to my Freddie?" she asked angrily.

"What are you talking about?" I snapped, in full defense mode already. If she was going to try to blame me for something, I'd fight back; I don't care _how _injured she was.

Marissa just frowned sadly. "I've just... I haven't seen him look this sad in a long time."

I took a deep breath, and I was about to tell her how Freddie thought it was his fault, how he thought that he was selfish because he was hurting his family with his sickness. But I knew that if I told her that, she'd freak out in the way she always did. And I decided if anyone would tell her, it would have to be Freddie. So, I lied through my teeth, "I honestly don't know."

There was complete silence in the room for a few minutes, which gave me a moment to think about Freddie. He was just making himself hurt. This was a coincidence, and it was eating him up inside. After thinking about him for a while, I realized that he'd been out of the room a while just to be getting us drinks. Without a word to Marissa, I stood up from Freddie's bed into the kitchen. I didn't see Freddie anywhere.

Before I would start freaking out and frantically looked around, I slowly stepped around the apartment, trying to be silent so Marissa wouldn't notice anything fishy. Everything looked the same; untouched. Then it caught my eye: the sticky note on the fridge.

I quickly walked over to the note, and held my breath when I saw that it was Freddie's handwriting in red pen. There was a red pen sitting beside the fridge. I grabbed the note and read it silently:

"Dear Sam and Mom,

I'm leaving. Not forever, so please don't bother looking for me. I just need some time alone in a place where I can think because I need to get my thoughts straight. I'll be home when I get this figured out. Don't. Look. For. Me.

I'm sorry,

Freddie."

I grabbed the cold counter behind me so that I wouldn't fall down. I took a long, shaky breath.

Freddie was gone.


	28. A Search

**Chapter 28: A Search **

**Author's Note: FOUR-HUNDRED REVIEWS... Wow. Thank you guys so much, from the bottom of my heart. My close friends and close family know that I'm into writing, but they've never really read any of my stuff, and it feels great to know that you guys like this. I appreciate it beyond belief. I honestly love how into this you guys are; it means so much to me. I never want to end this story! :/ Well anyway, that's not for a while so no worries. :D**

**P.S. Again, this is going to be split into two parts because of the length... And maybe, possibly, for a little bit of suspense ;). Hehehe. Review!**

I started pacing, Freddie's sticky note in my hand, breathing a bit louder than I was before. I was almost freaking out. _I_ could barely survive on my own; let alone _Freddork_. He said he'd be back, but what if something happened before then? And really... why was I caring so much?

Marissa wheeled herself in, and she had a confused look on her face. "Sam, why are you breathing so loudly?" she asked, seeming angry. "And where's my Freddie?" She forced herself to turn her head to look for him, and I heard a crack come from her neck as she did so. The things she did for her son. She slowly turned her head back to me. "What's that in your hand?" she asked, almost growling. I could tell she was about to start freaking out because she somehow knew.

"Uh, I..." my voice faded, because I didn't want to tell her. I slowly walked over to her and handed her the mustard colored sticky note, and then I stepped back quickly before she started reading it.

Marissa snatched it out of my hand, and I watched her light eyes move quickly as she read the note. I saw tears form in her eyes I stepped back as much as I could until I hit a wall because I was ready to hear her scream. _She's gonna blame this all on me_, I thought.

"Samantha Puckett," Marissa said in the creepiest, flattest but angriest whisper I'd ever heard from her. She grabbed the armrest of her wheelchair and surprisingly pulled herself to her feet, struggling as she stood. She couldn't stand completely straight, and she couldn't walk fast or with big steps. She took small, short steps toward me, an angry look on her face.

I felt my back against the kitchen wall and felt myself slide down the wall, so I was sitting on the tiled floor against the wall with my face buried in my knees. I closed my eyes, flashbacks flashing through my mind like a horror movie. I remembered my drunken mom as she kicked me when I was down, figuratively and literally.

I remembered situations just like this, when my mom would blame me for something that I absolutely didn't do. I remembered already being hurt the night before, but my mom still kicking me and hitting me and punching me. I remembered crying with the most scared feeling ever, and I remembered that smirk on my mom's face when I did so. For some reason, at this moment, I was remembering everything.

I think it was because Marissa had an angry look on her face, just like my mom used to.

_She's gonna hurt me, _I thought. _I can hurt her back, she's weak, but then she'll kick me out. I hate this. I hate life. Everyone is like this, I can't take it. _As I thought, I unintentionally whispered out, "Don't hurt me." I felt tears in my eyes, but my face was still against my knees so I just shut my eyes tightly and wiped the tears off, onto my jeans.

I heard silence, and I didn't even hear a sound of Marissa walking away. I slowly looked up, my eyes stinging, to see Marissa still standing there. But now, instead of having the angry face she was wearing before, her face softened and she looked sympathetic and guilty, with a dash of confused. The moment she slightly moved her hand out toward me, I flinched a bit, but she did a slow, careful movement of just putting out her hand for me to take so she could help me up.

I breathed a shaky breath and grabbed Marissa's cold, bony hand, and lifted myself to my feet. I stood before Marissa, as she was a bit taller than me so I slightly looked up. "Sam... no matter what happens, ever, you know I would absolutely _never _hurt you."

I looked down. "Well, you were mad. That's what adults do when they're mad, right? They hurt their kids," I muttered, feeling almost stupid because deep down I knew that wasn't true. A second later, I regretted saying that. Marissa was just now discovering that my mom was truly abusive. The only person I'd told was Freddie, and I wasn't planning to tell anyone else. I thought I was done being traumatized.

"Oh, Sam," Marissa whispered, and she quickly threw her arms around the tops of my shoulders into a hug. She awkwardly shook me as she hugged me, and what made it more awkward was that I wasn't hugging her back. My arms were just hanging by my sides. I wasn't much of a "hug-Freddie's-mom" type of girl. She stopped shaking me but she kept her arms around me. I sighed and slowly patted her back three times. That was all she needed, and then she smiled and pulled away.

I rubbed my temples in a circular motion. "Look... just pretend that never happened, okay?" I sighed, glancing back at the note. "We really need to find Freddie..."

Marissa's smile quickly faded, as if before she'd almost forgotten about her dear son being gone and missing. It was weird, because knowing Marissa, _nothing _would make her forget about that kind of thing for even half of a second. I guess finding out that I was an abused child and that's why I've been living with them for months now can really shock a person.

"Sam... it's hard for me to even walk without being in excruciating pain," Marissa said, shutting her eyes tightly and touching her back as if even the thought of pain hurt her. "I _need _to find my Freddie and I can't let him run away again. He could get hurt, and I'd have no idea what to do with myself." I remembered when after we went to the cemetery after it'd been five years after Freddie died, he told me that his mom was so overprotective of him because of the fact that his dad died and Marissa didn't want to lose the other person she loved more than the world. Marissa then placed her hand on my shoulder and looked me seriously in the eyes. "You know Freddie so well... Honestly, it's hard to say, but since you two are teenagers, you might know him better than _I _do."

_No surprise there,_ I thought.

"You have probably talked to Freddie more than anyone else lately," she continued. "Even Carly. Therefore, I think you may be the only person who might know where he is. And, you might be the only person who will be able to get him back home. I need you to go find him, Sam."

I widened my eyes and took in a deep breath. "M-me?" I stuttered. _Oh no_, I thought. _I have no idea where he is! And if he gets hurt, it'd be all my fault. Marissa would hate me... almost as much as I'd hate myself._

I heard a crack as Marissa slowly sat back into her wheelchair. "I'll give you some leftover ham, and I'll give you money for a cab or bus or something. The doctors told me I can't drive yet, so I'm sorry. Keep your cell phone with you, and if you're not back in two hours and forty-three minutes, I will call the police to look as well." Marissa wheeled herself over to the fridge and grabbed a big, cold ham. She put it on the table, and I quickly dug in, taking the few moments I had to _not _stress over Freddie.

* * *

I had to pay the cab driver extra when I asked him to just drive around wherever, which didn't make sense to me. Wouldn't that cost less? I shrugged it off though, because it was Marissa's money after all.

I probably should have had a specific place in mind, but I honestly had no idea where to look. It's true, I did know Freddie very well now that I thought about it, but that had nothing to do with any places... did it?

In the older times, I would have thought he'd be at Carly's house right away. But now, I knew that there was absolutely no way. I stared at the sticky note, which wasn't very sticky anymore because I'd been holding it so long with my sweaty hands. I tried to see if he left any clues to where he might have possibly been. The note read: "_I just need some time alone in a place where I can think..._"

_Okay, _I said. _He wants to be alone. There's a clue! He's not like... at the store or something. Not that I would expect that anyway. And... well, I know he loves the fire escape at our apartment, but he couldn't be there because he would have to go through his room first. Hmm..._

I looked out the window. Night was approaching, as the sky was becoming dark. I closed my eyes and thought back to all of the places I'd been with Freddie before. I narrowed it down to places that meant a lot to him.

My eyes then shot open, and I gasped. The taxi driver came to a sharp stop, startled by my sudden outburst. Thank God we weren't on a highway, just a small street.

"I've got it!" I exclaimed, with total, one hundred percent confidence that I was absolutely right.


	29. I Need You

**Chapter 29: I Need You**

**Author's Note: Wow... I'm so sorry; it took me almost two months to update. Thank all of you so much for the reviews... I don't know if I've ever gotten that many reviews from one chapter, so thank you so much(: Oh, and you guys guessed where Freddie was pretty well ;) You guessed the three main places I figured you'd guess. :D Well, you'll see! HAVE FUN READING, AND REVIEW!**

**P.S. OH MY GOSH. WHO SAW IOMG? OH MY GOSH. I'M JUST SO... OH MY GOSH. Well, considering I made this story over a year ago, I must say that the things that happened in iOMG did not happen in this story... I don't want to say too much, because it's possible that some of you didn't see the episode. (GO WATCH IT NOW. FIGURE OUT HOW. NOW.) But it is by FAR, the best iCarly episode... EVER. ;) If you saw it, you'll get why. :D**

After the taxi's sharp stop, the driver slowly drove again, going to the side of the street and pulling over. When the car finally stopped, he angrily turned his bald, dark head and asked angrily with an accent I couldn't identify, "Do you _want _us to get into a car accident?" I didn't answer, because I was guessing that was a rhetorical question.

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever," I muttered. I leaned forward, annoyed by the seatbelt over me right now. I knew exactly where Freddie was. It made complete sense. "Go to the nearest park to here, and step on it." When the taxi started moving again, I leaned back into my seat again and crossed my arms with a grin. I was pleased with and proud of myself for once. I finally figured something out. I finally did something right.

_Freddie better be there_.

We got to the park, and I smiled. I opened the taxi door, and before even getting out of the cab I breathed in the fimiliar air. The last time I was here it was Easter. I unbuckled my seatbelt and gave the taxi driver his money. I climbed out of the cab, seeing every tree and every piece of grass, just as it was months ago.

I heard the taxi drive away behind me, and I slowly stepped forward. Everything was the same, but different. I closed my eyes lightly, remembering standing at this exact spot, but with Freddie by my side the last time. On that Easter day, there were young kids running around and shrieking, competing to get the most Easter eggs. The excitement vibe was so clear that day.

I re-opened my eyes. Everything was so different now. The only sound I heard was the wind against the leaves of the tall trees. All I saw was the dark evening. The sky was nearly black, and the cool breeze lightly touched my cheek. I wasn't surprised that I didn't see Freddie just yet. I turned slightly to the right. I remembered exactly the place that Freddie would be.

I walked awkwardly, but then I decided to do a light jog. I remembered running there at full speed with Freddie last time, huge smiles on our faces. Now, I had a small smile on my face just by the memory. But I was anxious. If Freddie wasn't here, I was out of ideas. I stopped when I saw a slight motion; I realized it was the bench swing, swinging slowly. I saw a figure sitting on the bench. I smiled again, and I slowly walked closer, recognizing that it was Freddie. I found him.

Freddie was wearing a black sweatshirt, staring down at his big sneakers. He looked so different from when we sat on that bench the last time. He looked... well, to say the least, he looked sad.

"Sam, what are you doing here?" Freddie was still looking down, and I didn't notice him glance at me for a second. I didn't know how he knew I was there.

"Freddork," I said so softly, it was almost a whisper, "more importantly, why are you here?" I slowly walked over and sat on the spot next to him on the bench swing. I heard him take a deep breath, and I turned my head. I leaned down a bit to try to look at his face, because he was still looking down.

"I don't know," he whispered after a hesitation. Freddie looked up into my eyes. I noticed the pattern in his eyes that I hadn't seen in a while. His eyes also looked slightly wet, with the light of the moon reflecting off of them. "I just don't want to hurt anyone anymore."

I used all of my will power to stay patient here. I wasn't going to lie, or say anything he just wanted to here. "Name _one _person that you have hurt," I said, now in my regular voice.

Freddie gave me his annoyed look that he'd always used to give me when I made fun of him. "My dad... my mom?" he said as if it was obvious.

"Your dad died in a car accident," I said, trying to be comforting, but I knew that I still sounded like my regular self. "Your mom got into a car accident. The people to blame are the people that hit into their cars. It's never your fault that you're sick. So suck it up and come home." The last part just kind of blurted out.

Freddie stared at the palms of his hands as if there was something weird on them, which there wasn't. "I know, Sam. I just feel like I have some curse."

"Well, you _don't_. Fredweird, can you please stop with all this drama queen chiz and come home?" I was getting annoyed, and my tone and the words I said didn't hide that emotion at all.

Freddie stood up and slowly paced around, keeping his left hand slightly on his chin as if he was thinking deeply. I sat on the bench swing, my feet just barely touching the cold ground, slightly moving myself very slowly. I looked at the dark shadow of Freddie a foot or two away from me, as my eyes got more used to the darkness.

I used my hands to slowly lift myself up off of the bench swing. I awkwardly walked over to Freddie, swinging one foot in front of another as I walked. Freddie turned his head, and even through the darkness I could see the his brown eyes.

"Freddie... can I be honest with you?" I said in a voice so soft that I bet he could just barely hear me.

Freddie looked at me. He knew this was serious. I was talking slowly and quietly and I called him by his real name, as I stood just in front of him, showing the real height difference between the two of us. "Of course, Sam. Anytime."

"You saved my life," I whispered, feeling like I wasn't even controlling the words that came out of my mouth. "Not how you saved Carly's life. But you still saved my life just the same. I don't know where I would have gone and what I would have done if you didn't take me in. And even afterwards, _you _were the one person I talked to about everything. _You _were the only person who cared and _you _tried to help. You followed me when I ran away, and you've somehow been there for me whenever I needed you... always. I don't get it sometimes, how you can be how you are. And you _know _I'm not lying, 'cause I'm Sam, and you know I don't normally talk like this. But... I've never met anyone like you before in my life."

Freddie's face had softened after every word I said. I felt like I was finally reaching him. I was talking without an act. I was speaking my mind.

"Freddie, I _need _you."

Freddie took a few seconds, and slowly he took in every word I'd said. Finally, his serious expression turned into a small smile, and I could swear that I saw a slight wet shine in his eyes. I knew I reached him. He slowly brought me into a hug, and it felt like forever since we'd had a hug like this. He wrapped his arms around my waist, and I wrapped mine around his neck. My head rested lightly on his shoulder, and I was on the tip of my toes. This felt like a real romantic hug, like a boyfriend hug. Only Freddie made me feel like this, and he'd never even been my boyfriend.

We slightly pulled away, still in a hug, but now our faces were a few inches away. Then, I felt both of our faces slowly shift closer to each other, tilting a bit at every moment that we became closer.

Everything was cold and quiet. The only thing I could hear was Freddie's very quiet breathing. I then realized that I was holding my own breath. I noticed that Freddie and I were subconsciously leaning toward each other, very slowly. My face became so close to his that I could feel his warm breath against my lips. This was happening. This was really happening.

Our lips became so close that I could feel the sweet energy going on between them. There was probably half an inch left until the kiss. This all felt like it was going in slow motion, when really it probably wasn't. My eyes shut lightly, and all I could see was black.

Suddenly, through my shut eyes, I saw white lights. I thought for a second that these were sparks I was feeling from kissing Freddie, but then I realized that we hadn't kissed yet. We spent all of this time getting closer in order to kiss. And _we didn't kiss_.

I opened my eyes, and quickly turned to my right. I finally saw where the lights were coming from. A police car had drove up, stopped on the grass in the park. In the backseat, I saw the familiar figure of Marissa slowly come out.

My arms were still around his neck and his around my waist, but now our faces were far. We were hugging. And we didn't kiss. I couldn't believe it.

Perfect timing, cops.

Marissa stood, and she almost seemed to _run _over to us. She was still injured, but I guess seeing her son in full health and knowing that he was most likely safe gave her the adrenaline rush that she needed.

Freddie and I quickly let go of each other at the same time, and after one awkward glance, we both looked down. When Marissa finally reached us, she had tears in her eyes as she threw her arms around Freddie, and he grinned and threw his arms back around his mother. I smiled at the two of them.

Marissa pulled away, keeping one arm still around her tall son. She looked at me, a genuine smile on her face. "Sam... thank you so much." She then reached out an arm, the one that wasn't around Freddie, and he did the same thing. I sneered at them, before and even after I realized that they wanted to do a "group hug". But then, I looked at Freddie, and he was giving me his usual smirk. As usual, that smirk helped me give in. And so, I went into their arms, and I shared a warm, real hug with two people who truly cared about me.

I finally felt like part of a family. Marissa was absolutely nothing like a mother to me. Usually, daughters are supposed to be like their mothers. I'd never been anything like Marissa at all. But, she cared about me for some reason. And I'd accept.

And, Freddie was nothing like a brother to me. This was especially because we were about to _kiss_. But, he was my best friend. I know, I know, I had Carly. But, Freddie was different in every way. He was my best friend, and maybe the only person that I could talk to about anything. Maybe the only person that I actually cared about when he talked to me.

This family was one dysfunctional family. But, I loved it more than anything.


	30. Back to Normal?

**Chapter 30: Back to Normal?**

**Author's Note: Geez guys, are you surprised? I know I am. But yes, I'm back. And I sincerely apologize for not updating this in like, over a year. I guess that this year has been the busiest of my life, but besides that, I guess I sort of lost my inspiration for Seddie. I haven't been in the Seddie gossip much lately :P, but I feel like they rushed into dating too quickly. Like they find out they like each other and then the next thing you know, they're dating like none of their crazy past has ever happened. But the inspiration is back! It's mostly because one of my best friends is obsessed with Seddie and she talks to me about it a lot so I've been more excited about them too. But anyway, the other night, I decided to look back at my fanfiction and I went straight to this story and I read every chapter. I don't know if you guys remember, but I had added another chapter (now deleted) asking you guys if you think I should have left the 29th chapter as the last chapter. I didn't mean to make that chapter the last one, but a lot of you seemed to think so. But, I actually had a written outline of what I wanted to put in the rest of the chapters, and I'd like to write them. I know that most of you probably forgot about this story, but I remember how amazingly you guys all reviewed and stuff, so I decided I WILL finish it. :) Like I said, you guys probably forgot about this story, so if you want, you might want to look back at the past few chapters so you remember what was going on. Anyway, this is the longest author's note EVER, so I'm gonna shut up and get to the story. But one last thing: thank you guys so much, and I am so sorry for not updating this story in so long.**

**P.S. I don't think I even have to say this, but obviously, in this story, iOMG and everything after never happened.  
**

**P.S.S. By the way, just so that there's no more confusion, I'm pretty sure the last chapter will be called "Epilogue". But if not, I'll tell you guys when it's the last one!**

Life was actually pretty normal after that. Well, it depends what you'd think of as normal. In case you haven't noticed, my life has never been normal. And living with a neurotic forty-something year old woman and her computer geek son who I almost kissed but pretended it never happened... that was the furthest from normal it could go.

Yeah, you read right. That night pretty much isn't spoken of at all. It was an emotional night for all of us. Marissa was scared out of her mind, like usual. But Freddie had a meltdown, which isn't normal for him. He's usually the one that holds us all together. And I shared some of my innermost feelings with him, which is always just awkward for me to do. But the whole highlight of the night for me was the fact that Freddie and I almost kissed. I still wasn't completely sure of my feelings for him before that, and I'm still not. But I knew there was something.

But the thing is, he was leaning in too.

And after Marissa and the police came, we became one big happy family again. Yay. But I had this lingering annoyance about the fact that we never spoke of the kiss. I didn't want to bring it up because I was embarrassed about the fact that I may have exposed my feelings for the biggest nerd I know besides Nevel. I was also afraid that Freddie was just caught up in a moment but he really didn't want to kiss me. So, I just left it unspoken, even though it made me really mad. Every day, it annoyed me more and more.

But I was content. Marissa was still an overprotective freak, but the fact is, she realized that her little Fredward was growing up so much that he wouldn't stand for all of her craziness anymore. So basically, she made sure not to do anything to put him over the edge again. And I enjoyed that.

Things were normal, for once. But, just like the rest of my life, the normality wouldn't last.

* * *

I was going to a picnic at the beach with Freddie, his mom, Aunt Jennifer, Uncle Carl, and cousin Amanda. Gross. When I asked why, Marissa basically said "bonding time". Grosser.

"Ugh, Fredweird, do I _have _to go?" I groaned tiredly as he walked around our room getting ready for the family picnic. I was still slouching on my cot, my elbow resting on my thigh with my head resting in my hand.

Freddie turned to me and smirked. Walking over to me, he replied, "Yes, you have to go. And do you want to know why you have to go?"

I glared up at him, slightly squinting. "Why is that?" I asked with sarcastically fake enthusiasm.

"Because you are _not_ leaving me alone with icky Amanda."

I rolled my eyes and sighed loudly. "Fine," I said, getting up and looking through my clothing drawers. Freddie followed behind me and looked through his drawers, and he smirked at me as I looked through my clothes in such a bored manner.

"Come on, Puckett," Freddie said with a slight half-smile. "You'll have fun. You know it."

I ignored him as if he didn't even say anything. I've been holding a slight grudge against him since that night because he's acting like a dork when he should be a man and bring up the almost-kiss. I walked into our shared bathroom silently and closed the door loudly, putting on my loose-fitting dark blue tee shirt and jean Bermuda Shorts.

I walked out of the bathroom and Freddie gave me a weird look. "_Someone's_ in a bad mood," he stated.

I smirked. "I'm fine."

Freddie raised his eyebrows for a short moment and he walked past me toward the bathroom, brushing his shoulder against mine. For a second I just stayed still, staring into space, but after that I turned my neck, watching him walk away into the bathroom. Even the way he walked bothered me... but in a good way.

When did I become so complicated?

* * *

We were at the beach. According to Marissa, it wasn't even going to be one of those fun beach days where you get to swim deep in the ocean and tan. We were going to just "find a nice, shady place and eat some nutritious lunch". But just in case, I wore my black bathing suit under my clothes, and Freddie wore his red swim trunks as his shorts. I wore my dark aviators so no one would be able to see the expression on my face.

We found Jennifer, Carl, and Amanda at the beach. Amanda looked the same as last time; she was tall, and her dirty blonde hair was in straight and shiny in its high ponytail. When we made eye contact, the first thing she did was smirk at me and glance at Freddie then back at me.

I shook my head slowly, staring her down. This was not a day to annoy me.

Amanda shrugged, smiling happily. We got over to them and the family shared hugs with each other as I awkwardly stood by myself. After saying hi to Freddie and his mom, Amanda walked over to me, wearing her pink-and-white striped tank top that slightly showed her stomach.

I was afraid that she was coming over to hug me, but instead she just grabbed my wrist and pulled me aside. "How are things?" she asked quietly with a surprisingly big smile on her face.

"Uh... Fine?" I replied.

"I mean, did you tell Freddie that you're in love with him yet?" Amanda asked with a very big grin.

I took my sunglasses off from over my eyes and instead put them on my head, holding my hair away from my face. "Look Amanda. I'm not in love with your little cousin. Love is a strong word."

"Fine, fine. I meant, did you tell him you like him?" she corrected.

"No! Because I don't!" I yelled, now catching the attention of the other four, as they all looked at me.

"Take a picture," I muttered under my breath, "it'll last longer."

Freddie slightly patted my shoulder in an understanding way as we all sat down on the picnic blanket. It was his way of telling me that he understood why I yelled without needing an explanation. I turned toward him and gave him a small smile, and he looked deeply into my eyes in a way that mesmerized me... And in other words, scared me.

So, naturally, I put my sunglasses back over my eyes and turned away.

* * *

Benson family outings are just so _boring_. I ate almost all of the food that Freddie's uncle and aunt brought because I was so sick of Marissa's disgusting food. Everyone was staring at me, slightly sneering, as I scarfed down a bunch of food. Everyone except Freddie, that is. He was used to me.

After that, all of them started talking about some boring subject. The news, politics or something. Who cares? While they talked, I laid back, leaning on my elbows as I stared at the foaming blue waves hitting the shore.

Freddie exited the conversation between the five of them when he noticed me. He leaned back with me, blocking my view of the waves. "Having fun?" he asked sarcastically.

"No," I said flatly. "And you said I would. You lied."

Freddie sighed, still slightly smiling. He stood up, holding out his hand to help me up. "We're gonna take a walk," Freddie told the rest of them. I sighed extra loudly. How was _walking_ going to make this more fun?

"Oh! We'll come along," Aunt Jennifer said excitedly, grabbing her small camera case as the rest of them all slowly stood up.

I glared up at Freddie. He smirked at me. "Wanna run?" he asked.

Without another word, the two of us sprinted down the beach, our feet making marks in the moist sand. I turned around, seeing that the rest of the family was just strolling in a normal speed in our direction, not trying to chase after us. It was fun anyway. It was a very long beach so we could run far. Finally, Freddie stopped with his hands on his knees, out of breath.

"Do you think we lost them?" he breathed, smiling.

I chuckled, turning around. "Yeah, I think so." I sat down by the shore with my legs out, letting the waves hit my legs, just up to the top of my calves. Freddie sat next to me the same way.

"Why are you extra moody today?" he asked.

I shrugged. "No reason," I said. I wasn't really lying. There wasn't a particular reason I was in a bad mood today. I was just a little bit annoyed about the almost-kiss, but I was annoyed about that every day since it happened.

Freddie and I were silent for a while until I sighed loudly. Freddie moved closer to me and took my sunglasses off of my eyes. "Hey," he said in an extremely gentle and soft manner, making me think he was going to try to comfort me or something. He tossed my sunglasses a little bit behind us and grinned. "Wanna swim?"

My heart dropped with anger because it almost seemed as if he was teasing me on purpose. Deep down I knew he wouldn't play with my feelings like that but that was what it felt like. Without words, I quickly started taking off my shirt and shorts and before he even took off his shirt, I ran into the ocean wearing my black bikini. He ran after me in his red bathing suit.

We ended up finally being our normal selves again, laughing and splashing. At one point Freddie went underwater and then stood up while picking me up, giving me a piggyback ride. I held onto him, my arms around his shoulders and my legs wrapped around his back.

Freddie turned around to look at me, his face very close to mine. He couldn't turn his head completely around of course, so it wasn't like our lips were close to touching. "I hope you're okay," he said. "I'm always here for you, okay? I hope you've realized that by now."

I thought back to all that he's done for me. He ran away from home for me, stayed up all night in a disgusting train station while I slept for me, he took me in to his home... He became my best friend. And he let me be his.

I squeezed my arms a little harder against his shoulders. "I know," I said. "Thanks."

We got out of the water and laid down on the sand next to each other.

"Freddie! Sam! There you are!" exclaimed Marissa, walking toward us. She was closing her cell phone, which made me realize that she just got off the phone. I was hoping she didn't just call the police because she couldn't find us. But we could tell that she looked worried and shocked.

Freddie and I stood up, sand sticking to our backs. "What is it?" Freddie asked his mom.

"They found out who the drunk driver who hit into me was," Marissa said.

"Who?" Freddie and I asked in unison, and I slapped his shoulder.

Marissa looked at me, her eyes wide and almost afraid-looking. "Sam... it was your mother."

I fell to my knees.


	31. Author's Note (Temporary)

**Hi guys. Okay. Before you read any of this, I want you all to know that ****_I WILL BE FINISHING THIS STORY._**

**I know you all just can't stand me right now. I've been reading your reviews and honestly I teared up. I never thought I would have this much support on my writing. Each and every one of you has seriously impacted my life more than you can even imagine. I can't even explain it. I have loved writing ever since I learned the alphabet. A lot of people love writing, but almost no one is lucky enough to have so much support. **

**All in all, you guys mean the absolute world to me.**

**I was so young when I started this story. I can't believe the way I've grown since I started it. But ugh. I'm sorry I'm rambling. You guys really just mean the WORLD to me.**

**I love you guys.**

**And be sure to check back here because I will be updating this story this summer. :)**

**Thank you so much for your immense support even though I take forever to update the story. I will probably do some writing on the side throughout my life, so if I ever actually do some writing in the real world, I promise to tell you guys. So please check in for that!**

**I love you all.**


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